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@pisces-I clearly did not read you most recent post. I am so sorry if you had a chemical :( How did i not know you did IVF???

@lsch yes I had IVF back in 2011...they transferred three viable eggs, two implanted, I carried them for 3/4 weeks and then something went wrong and I lost them both. I wish I had known then what I know now and I would have made them pump their brakes. They were after the money and not really concerned about a successful IVF. My insurance approved me for 3 cycles and I am willing to bet that if I had said its a one time shot that they would have made sure that all ducks were in a row before running me through the process. I was assured that 2weeks of prenatal vitamins was all I needed to prepare for IVF. Now, I would have worked on my egg quality for about 3/4 months before I rushed into IVF. They did a cervix dialation for no reason and I had no idea so I just kept going along with whatever they said. ð???

These cramps feel the same, it is so bad. I am at work but only because I have no one to cover me.

@pisces-I didn't know that. So does that mean your insurance might cover treatment if you pursue it again?

Pisces...honey I'm so sorry. Hope your dr can give you peace of mind and you feel better. Hugs to you.

Lschrader. ..so happy you found an office you like. Don't beat yourself up about the other place. Knowledge is power, and now you have more than before. Just keep pressing onward.

Football... I totally get the fear, but just shake it off. Your little man is safe and healthy right now, take comfort in that. I think just about every mom to be feels fear at some point.

Athena...you're doing a great job with Eli. Like Lschrader said, some babies are just small. (I mean weight wise. ) My dd was like that. It took her forever to get chubby, and she was always smaller than her brothers. Eli is so happy in his pictures, he makes me smile.

Skyline...love your pictures! Oliver is so sweet.

Zyara...fxd for you this cycle.

Afm...not too much going on. Trying to get back into my normal school routine with the kids. It never faiks as soon as I get one child going, the other needs help or Titus gets a dirty diaper or its time to start lunch or put clothes in the dryer....but I'm happy. Life is good.

@football - I started feeling afraid in the 3rd trimester. Not too bad, but I would have moments where I would start worrying about things I hadn't worried about before. I would soak in the tub and listen to a pregnancy meditation on youtube. :) Yes, it looks really weird when those muscles first separate. :-P I saw a couple of posts about stillbirths on the WTE app, seeing a lot would be pretty unsettling! It was probably a good idea to get rid of it.

@zyara - This was your first time celebrating Thanksgiving? Cool. :) Glad you had a good time! Where are you from originally? My fingers are crossed, hope you come back bearing good news!!

@athena - lol! We try to keep Oliver from looking at screens (they say it's good to limit letting them look at screens in the first 2 years ), and he is such a stinker, he wants to look at the TV so bad. He likes to look at the Christmas tree too. :) Oliver smiles and coos tons, but he he has only laughed 3 times so far, and that was like 3 weeks ago! So weird. I can't wait for him to do it some more, it was so cute.

@pisces - Oh no. When I first read that AF came at 11DPO my first thought was chemical. Sending you big hugs! So sorry you had to work through such pain, I hope the cramping has eased up. I was wondering the same as LSchrader, can you get IVF again, or was that your only chance at having it covered?

@LSchrader - Still no sign of AF, so I'm thinking the CM was not ovulation, but it might still be too soon to tell. I should probably get back to tracking things with my cycle app. I'm so glad you are finding out new information on the whole IVF/IUI thing. I really hope it doesn't turn out that your DH has the issue with the caps and all the time and money spent on IUI was wasted. I would be ticked if that were the case.

@rebecca - I can only imagine! That's one of the big reasons I'm not sure if I can manage homeschooling; I'm so scatterbrained. I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. Hope you get a daily routine sorted out soon.

@miracle - Hope you are doing well, and check in soon!

AFM - Today hasn't been a good day. After Oliver's early morning feeding I couldn't turn off my thoughts and I started going back over the labor and c-section and week in the NICU. I realized that I couldn't remember the moment I first held him! It's just been one of those days, I don't have many, but out of the blue the regrets and disappointments surrounding those 11 days will come flooding back. Weirdly, my incision will start hurting at the same time, I don't know if the incision pains make me start having the feelings, or visa versa.

My biggest advice to those of you expecting and still waiting for your BFP, try and make room in your budget for a good doula. Maybe it's just me, but having a third person there to advocate for me and support me through the rough moments would have made a HUGE difference. (And that's even with having DH by my side the whole time doing an amazing job.)

Anyway, I know the bottom line is Oliver made it safe and sound and we are both okay. That's the most important thing! And I TRIED to prepare myself mentally for the event that things would not go as I hoped they would. I just never imagined how hard it would be to process and accept the disappointment. And I could never have guessed that I would go into labor during the busiest night of the year and have to deal with the midwives and hospital staff being in complete chaos. (You just kind of take for granted that there will be a room for you when you check into labor and delivery, you know!?)

Okay, I'll stop belly aching now, I just had to get that off my chest.

@pisces - I am so sorry to see your post about your BIL passing. :( That is so saddening. Sending more hugs your way.

Skyline...I'm so sorry you had a blue moment today. I understand the disappointment you felt and may still feel about the way delivery went. I wish I'd never had any of my csections, that all of my kids could have been vaginal births. I met a really nice woman the other day and we started talking about babies and giving birth, and I pretty much left feeling like I was a terrible mom for not having a home birth with no meds! :) She didn't mean it that way, but that's how it made me feel. I shook it off after awhile. Hope things go differently for you next time! (And by the way, if you wanted to homeschool, I know you could.)

Pisces...praying for your brother in laws family. So sorry to see that.

@sky sorry you were feeling blue. Just stay focused on the positive, Oliver is a loved, beautiful, growing & healthy boy and that is the blessing.

@rebecca same for you. You ladies are blessed.

Remember this, back the day women died in childbirth and many children were lost as well. Please do not focus on the c-sections...focus and thank God that for the advances in technology and that all of you are here safe. I thank God for C-Sections because that how me and my sister both got here..lol

AFM: for those who do not have my FB..my brother in law needed a kidney for the past four years. My husband nor any of the siblings were a match. A group of people at his church went to get tested and they found a match. In September there was a lot of back n forth about his heart and how his heart was beginning to fail. Although we all disagreed, he proceeded with the surgery. The girl went through her part of the surgery but when it was my BIL's turn he coded (heart stopped) before even making it to the operating table. They worked on him for 30m and revived him but he never regained consciousness. On dec 11th at 2:30 am he lost his long battle and went home to be with Lord. His wife, 4 small children, my poor husband and his family are devastated. I am devastated. He was a sweet heart, an amazing father, and hard worker. This is a tremendous blow.

Also, they believe I had a chemical. My bloodwork from Wednesday quantatuve 8 and today it was a 2. I have still cramping and a steady light flow.

Talk about a tough week but nothing compared to what my sister in law is going through. This morning I woke up with my husbands arms wrapped around me and poor Nicole will never wake up to her husband again. As happy as I am to have my husband home, my heart just broke for her this morning and just couldn't stop crying. Please keep us in your prayers.

@pisces - That is so sad! His poor wife and kids! I am so sorry you are dealing with the extra hurt at such a painful time. :( **HUGS**

Thought I had better pop in but it'll be short and sweet.

Pisces I'm so sorry to hear about your BIL and chemical. Thoughts and hugs sent your way.

I'm reading along but cant stay online long, my eyes are terrible at the minute, got myself an appointment next week as i'm sure I need glasses.

Hope your all prepared and looking forward to Christmas.

Will respond fully next week to you all ladies. much love.