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Miracle...you are a strong woman. I'm thankful you're here and able to feel joy again. And you're exactly right, it is the worst pain and helpless feeling ever.

I'm afraid of going to the appointment today, although i could swear I'm feeling movement already. I felt Elijah early, too. A perk I guess of being pregnant 9 times.

Mrssuz...hang in there, dear. Sometimes I think testing is the most draining part!

@ football so sorry hun plz update when you can let us know how your doing?

and yes you have to heat all deli meats up to steaming hot , they say when pregnant and elderly you have a higher chance of catching listeria that includes hot dogs

AFM as of monday im still at 50% effaced , thats a good thing they are holding in . i go back on march 10th for another check and another u/s for measurements and fluid counts again , i have gained the 4 lbs i lost from being sick plus another 4 bringing total to 32 lbs so far , and eli's blood work is back his counts are still low, and to our surprise besides the milk allergy they also found out he is a class 2 allergic to wheat , and a class 1 allergic to eggs .. the classes of allergies only goes to a 5 .. yesterday was the hubs bday i felt so bad for him because of me being on complete bed rest we couldnt celebrate it , bad thing is him and our ds logan had to make his cake..

welcome to all the newcomers and good luck

@ introuble hope every thing is going ok for you , cant wait to see pics of your bundle..

Thanks Rebecca x

@lole-I have been thinking about you lately! I am so glad those babes are staying put. They need as much time as possible. So sorry about Eli's allergies. Just one more thing to have to worry about. Well, I bet that your DH would rather you stay put then get up and celebrate him. You can do something extra fun next year for him :)

@Football-I hope we hear from you today. I am praying that the bleeding was a false alarm, and that the bean is perfectly healthy. I hope you are doing ok.

@mrssuz-Sorry about the BFN. You are not out until the witch shows. Hopefully your levels are just rising slower than your previous pregnancy. My sister didn't get her BFP until 13dpo...and it was by blood work. Her doctor said her levels were so low that she would not have tested positive on an HPT until probably 17dpo. Hang in there.

@rebecca-Thinking about you today. I know everything will go perfectly at your appointment. I hope you hear the HB!!

@kxmkate-Wow, what a journey you two have been on. I hope you get your BFP soon :)

AFM-Well ladies...I finally got my positive OPK last night. I told myself I was done testing, but i just had a feeling I needed to. Since I am Oing later this cycle, we have gotten a lot of BDing in since AF which is great. We have been BD more like ever 36-39 hours rather than 48. We have no idea what his count is like right now, but we are just going with it. I am hoping I O today...if I do, I should be getting the pains soon. I have had 5 days of straight EWCM. Crazy.

Hey everyone. Thank you for your kind words.

The bleeding continued last night and is now full blown. I didn't go to the doctor and I'm not in pain physically, but I know I'm miscarrying. It's heavier than my period.

My instincts told me this wasn't going to stick. I knew that the lines not getting any darker wasn't a good thing.

I wish I could say I was numb at this point, because then I wouldn't have to sort through the wide variety of emotions I'm feeling.

I'm grateful that God answered my prayer because now I know I CAN get pregnant. But while that will be comforting knowledge in a few days or weeks, right now I feel like a failure as a woman and mother. Right now I feel like a cruel joke was played on me. I want to hide in bed and just cry. And scream. And hide from the world.

I don't even know what to expect from my body the next few weeks.

Hopefully sometime soon in the future I'm able to carry a baby to full term.

Hope you ladies have a great day.

Football I'm so sorry, I can't even imagine what you are going through. You don't need to be using tampons if you are because they can cause infection. My friend has been through it three times and they told her to use pads.

@Football-oh girly I am so sorry. I was so hoping the bleeding would stop. I will be praying for you. I truly cannot imagine what you are going through, but I bet it does feel like a cruel joke. I hope DH is comforting you in this time of need. You are very right, now you would pregnancy is possible. The sad and scary fact is that so many women miscarry, some not knowing they are because they are not trying, and some like you who want it so bad. I will be praying for you. I am so sorry for your loss.

@Lschrader Thanks hun, but I got my BFP last cycle at 12 DPO so i know im out hun... Just feel different and know af is on her way :-(

@Fottball, im so sorry hunny... Same thing hapoened to me last cycle,... Its so cruel... Big hugs hunny xxx

Football...dear I'm so sorry. Yes, when it happens it can feel like a cruel joke, but God does not do that to us. Its just part of living in this world. I know it may not help, but sweetie you are not a failure as a mom or a woman. You loved your baby and did the best you could for him or her. Sometimes this happens. I have found that having an answer or not doesnt take the pain away...it's just something we have to go through.

We're here for you. I'm lifting you and your dh in prayer. Take your time, and take care of yourself. Let your hubby pamper you if he wants.

Afm...we heard the heartbeat, but this OB was the most incompetent, unprepared dr I've ever seen. I dont think we'll go back to her again. They said they were surprised to get the heartbeat since i was so fat! WTH? They also have no clue how far along I am. Clueless.

@rebecca-UM EXCUSE ME!? I would have slapped the doctor, holy moly!!! What an idiot. I hope you do not go back!! Glad you got to hear the HB though....and it was most definitely not because of your weight (because you are NOT fat)!!!