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All clear to start lupron today ... as soon as my meds arrive.

Looks like this is our last IVF attempt (though we may be able to do FET if this goes well/not well). We're nearing our threshold on our insurance with this cycle. My husband and I agreed we did not want to destroy our savings to do this (and of course it's already had an impact).

Since this is the cycle post-scratch (with an improved chance because of my repeated implantation failure), we gotta make this one count ... not that we haven't before.

This may be just what I needed to get on board mentally. I've just been dreading this depressing process. Now or never, baby!

Ssura good luck with the start of your cycle! Keep us posted on how things go.

Very quiet lately...what's going on with everyone?

Mnor - How are you doing?? We've missed you!!

Ssura - How is this cycle going so far?? How are you feeling??

Mrs. Fridley - I am so awaiting the day you announce your little one has arrived safe and sound!! :)

As for me, we have our 18 week ultrasound this afternoon. They will determine the gender but we won't find out until this upcoming Saturday at our family cookout gender reveal we are having. Those 5 days are going to be long ones!! :) We can't wait to find out what our sweet little one is! :)

Mnor! Good to hear from you :)

Ssurra - yes, looking for an update whenever you have the chance.

Gracealone - very exciting! Do you have a feeling either way on the gender? We have been debating on whether to do a gender reveal or not.

I'll have my first visit with the regular OB this Thursday and have an ultrasound just shy of 10 weeks. I've been really nervous lately. I just don't feel pregnant at all and it's been a while since I've seen that heartbeat! I will be majorly relieved this Thursday when I'm able to get yet another confirmation. I stopped PIO injections last Thursday and that has made me super nervous too!! It seemed a little early, but everything seems to be okay... no spotting or anything. The stress still hasn't left me yet!

waitinggame - So glad everything is still going smoothly with you and your little one! :) Seriously though, don't stress too much about not "feeling pregnant". I don't feel pregnant most of the time until I look down at my belly and i'm 18 weeks!! It's totally normal. I think we have this idea that when we get pregnant were going to just feel completely different!! But for the most part, other than the symptoms that come with pregnancy like nausea, headaches, back pain, heartburn...I don't "feel pregnant". Ive started to feel some subtle movement when i'm still the last couple weeks but other than that...nothin!! You're not the only one!! :) I think the no spotting part is the greatest indicator that your little one is probably fine. I wish you could just peek in there sometimes and they could just give you a thumbs up!! lol. Would help so much! :)

Hi, everyone -- Day 6 of stim meds and all is well. Had a monitoring appt this morning, and my doc counted 32 total follicles, still just below measurable size. She said she was really happy with how my body was responding.

Symptoms: general pissy-ness, occasional headaches. Overall, not bad at all.

Guessing we're looking at a late week trigger and Sunday or Monday retrieval.

Ssurra - sounds like you have a good number of follicles going! I hope you get plenty so you can freeze some too. What do they count as measurable? Last round I ended up triggering on day 6 of stims which was crazy, normally it was 11-12 days so the end of the week sounds about right.

Waitinggame - my experience has been spotting is a very bad sign so as long as you don't have that you shouldn't worry. I felt very pregnant with all 3 of my early losses so maybe it's better to not feel pregnant? If I remember correctly Mrs. Fridley said she didn't feel pregnant either for the longest time. Who knows! Seems like that's a good thing on this board. I hope your upcoming us eases your worries.

Gracealone - I feel like I am just as anxious to hear the gender as you! Don't make us wait too long!

Mrs. Fridley - I hope your lack of a message means you have a baby in your arms!

I have been having a really rough time lately. It doesn't help that one of my best friends had her baby over the weekend and facebook is plastered with adorable pictures. So now both my best friends have their babies and I am feeling left behind. I hope it gets better once I get going on our last fet round. Just thinking that this is our last attempt is heartbreaking. I am really not optimistic that it will work and kind of don't want to try anymore but we started this process and I have to ride it all the way to the end.

I have a consult and planning appt with our RE in exactly 2 weeks. I really hope she has some kind of different plan. I feel like we keep doing the same thing and getting the same result. I am really angry with them that they can't figure out why this keeps happening to me and how to prevent it. At this point it's easier to focus on being angry than sad because the sadness would just engulf me. I still think it's some kind of immune or clotting issue that the doctors are just missing. My intuition is telling me that something in my body is attacking my embryos soon after implantation and preventing them from growing. Even though my blood nk cell test came back normal I still think that's the problem and I am going to really push for either more testing or just for them to give me the medications for that anyways and see if it works.

MNOR, they said over 10 would be "measurable." As expected, I'm to return on Wednesday.

I completely relate to how you're feeling. Though I've not suffered your losses, I've never been pregnant. Never once, not an oops, not a maybe, nothing. I had a hard time getting ramped up for this -- what will likely be our final IVF cycle. FETs are possible, should we get enough freezable embryos. We will come close to reaching our insurance maximum for this IVF, but I think there will probably be close to enough for a FET, plus a ton of that is out of pocket anyway ($1K to freeze; $750 to thaw!).

We're not at this point interested in exploring adoption, and I wouldn't even know what to think about a surrogate. We really want this from us, and maybe that's terribly selfish, but it's the truth.

I managed to get myself motivated for this IVF cycle, but if it, too, fails, I will be back where I was prior, where you are now. Not feeling like anything will work so why bother.

You have some time to work on mentally revving yourself up, but you know, I told my RE that I was having trouble getting excited, and I was relieved when she told me I wasn't required to feel a certain way about the cycle. People spread good will like it has real, medical value but the truth is it doesn't. You're allowed to be pissed and upset.

I hope that you can find ways to enjoy your time "off"and not worrying and wishing but just living life a little bit. I feel like this process is so isolating because we end up living in this place called "trying to get pregnant," a secret world we can't really share with anyone. Or maybe that's just me. Ha.

Well, my ultrasound went great yesterday and I feel like I'm finally over a mental hurdle!! 10 weeks today. Yesterday we could see our sweet little peanut squiggling all around and we got some great shots of the arms and you can see the little hands and even make out the fingers. It was the most amazing thing. My DH was SO excited he just couldn't believe it finally looked like an actual baby!!! I feel good moving forward now. We will go back in a little over 2 weeks for the downs and genetic testing which will include the blood test to determine the gender.... even though everyone, even the u/s tech this time... seems to think it's a boy!

Mnor and ssurra - I can't remember if either of you said you tried acupuncture? I'm not sure that the actual treatment helped me, but once I went a few times it became so relaxing, which I think was very important and my acupuncturist really became someone for me to confide in.

Ssurra - how is your progress?? When are they anticipating retrieval now?!

Mnor - I sure know what you mean about being left behind. I'm pretty much the last of all my friends to have kids. Most are on their second and some third by now. In fact the day I told one of my good friends I was pregnant, she told me she was too... 2 weeks ahead of me with her 3rd. It's the most frustrating and depressing thing ever when it seems to happen to easily for everyone around you. I hope this next frozen cycle you can find some other things to focus on... maybe it will be a good thing if you aren't so "into it" this time? I think about you all the time and just know this has to happen for you one way or the other!! You too, ssurra!