Community post

So irritating. I’ve come to terms with this, and I don’t feel nasty. I slept with the wrong person, and that’s all it takes is 1 person. I went years with knowing I had it and not the slightest outbreak, and now it’s irritating. It’s essentially a skin condition in an inconvent area... but adding TTC, carrying and delivering a baby safely, then it’s a mess. Part of me worries about this during a second delivery especially since I’ve have some issues this year. I just want my second baby, but with my periods getting longer and longer, and now my recurrent issues with the herp, well it’s a mess. The doc wants me to chart, and do the ovulation sticks, but I think I’m going to give it a few more months.

I am sorry one wrong guy can damper your future plans so much. I couldn't imagine walking in your shoes, trusting a man you thought loved you, and he betrayed you in such a manner. I personally don't have experience in this but could you financially afford iui since your outbreaks are more frequent since falling ill?

If that isn't possible maybe if your broke out during o, i know this is very far fetched...finding a way to get his goodies in you with out intercourse? Maybe your obgyn may know of a way for you guys to do that at home. Sorry I'm not much help.

I just started the suppressive dose of valtrex this past month, I’m going to give it sometime to work. My period is starting up currently so we will see how this month goes! Never thought about iui! Something to look into, for sure!

Ok, this will take all the romance out of ttc (I'm sure an outbreak does the same) but it's much easier and cheaper than IUI. Buy some "softcups" (menstrual cups) and have dh do his business in that, then u just insert it up around the cervix and ur good to go. *Make sure it's softcups and not another menstrual cup like diva cup or whatever, those are too deep and hard.* It's cheaper and easier than IUI and u won't have to worry about questions or judgment from whomever is performing the IUI.
Hubs and I did this a few yrs back when we had guests staying over and I was ovulating early. U could use them in non-breakout cycles too, they're great to help keep the undies dry so u can carry about ur day feeling fresh.

I'm sorry ur going through all this, some guys are just assholes. My bff went through the same thing, except she's done having babies. Everything will work out...stay positive!
Good luck! =))

Never thought about soft cups either... if i can talk him into it... this is cycle day 1 for me today, so hopefully the suppressive dose of meds holds that awful virus at bay.

Just kind of scares me that if we do have the outbreaks so often, that they’ll continue on throughout pregnancy, and I don’t want a c-section, but I’ll gladly take one if it’s whats needed to be a baby safe!

So your ex knew he had it but says nothing? I have herpes as well and I don't know how I got it. Sometimes it stays silent for years... it's even possible that my bf gave it to me, even if he never had an outbreak himself, and that's more likely that it comes from me (I used to be young... and above all, very stupid).
This said, I am really sorry for you. Personnally, I only had one outbreak, and it wasn't half as bad as you described. It seems that herpes is linked to infertility, but not on the ovulation, on the implantation, and it's not the case for every woman.
I heard about the soft cup thing, it's seems to be a good option, even more doubled with opk and/or BBT. I don't know how they do things in your country, but when I had my daughter, they gave me valtrex at eight month pregnant to prevent an outbreak.

You aren't alone. It's highly annoying. I've had it, apparently, for about 10 yrs. I say apparently because the first breakout I had was low on my leg near my knee - I saw the doctor and they said I had shingles!! Never even suspected it was anything else. It's a similar virus. Never had an outbreak after that for years, but then about 4 yrs ago it happened again. Same place on my leg. This time I mentioned it to my OB and she recognized it at once. She tested and I had non-standard HSV II & I and was having a breakout due to my immune system lowering due to stress of planning my wedding. I had to tell my fiance about it - I was mortified and cried for days. He was totally cool with it - even tested to make sure I hadn't already passed it to him (or he was the source) and he's still clean today. We're just careful. I have BOs about 1x a year now, and have had one since being pregnant this time. I've done the softcup insertion method once and it worked out great. 1 -2 in 5 people have this virus. It's very annoying and can be very painful, but no one should judge you. Most people have it and don't even know it - I have no clue who I got it from or even how long I had it. It can lurk in your body for years before coming out. Just take lots of vitamins, including vit e and d and build up your immune system. It'll slow down.

This may be unwelcome because I know homeopathy is a controversial topic so please disregard as you see fit. From the research I've been doing for several years (I'm not a medical professional), using suppression medicine can hurt a lot. Since you are not curing the condition but merely suppressing the symptoms your body is trying to throw out, the risk is to drive the virus deeper and have it attack more vital parts of your body. I don't have personal experience with this particular remedy protocol but know a couple of people who were cured of their herpes using this. I have personally used other protocols taught on the website I am linking below with great success. Here is the link to a homeopathic protocol for HSV II: https://joettecalabrese.com/blog/homeopathic-remedy-for-genital-herpes/
Again, I know a lot of people think homeopathy doesn't work so I'm not trying to start a debate. I just thought it would be too bad not to post in case in can help someone.

@agatch Thank you for your imput, but to this point, all serious medical studies shows that herpes can't be cured. Maybe the symptoms of the people you know were eased by homeopathy (I don't believe in it, personnally, but you never know, there is maybe a placebo effect), but cured, no, that's scientifically unlikely, as there is no active ingredient in homeopathy.