Imaginary Pregnancy Symptoms!
So I'm clearly losing it. I mean I'm obsessing too much and I don't know how to stop! DH doesn't want another baby, we've talked about it so many times and before Christmas I told him I wouldn't push him or try and talk him into it, I'd just work on coming to terms with his decision. And I've genuinely tried. I have spent weeks and weeks reminding myself I'm happy with my life and I dont want to ruin what we have by holding onto a dream. I love my husband, our three boys are absolutely wonderful and I couldn't ask for more.
And yet...its still there. That niggling feeling that there is someone else to meet. So in my fertile period I silently wish he would skip the condom even once, although I dont say anything about it or show it in any way. And now in my two week wait, like last month, I think every day I'm noticing "symptoms". Even more so this month.
So on o-day this month we DTD, there was some contact that DH initiated and then he stopped to put on a condom. On 4dpo I had period-type cramps for hours, some on 5dpo too and I felt completely exhausted. Then 6dpo my bbt dipped slightly and I had this sharp pain like being poked with a stick. On 7dpo my bbt was back up and all the cramps stopped although I did get this sharp pain on one side that felt like round ligament, although obviously it cant have been. Then last night I had to get up during the night to pee and I've been peeing a bit more often all day. I've had a few spells of nausea and this evening I'm getting out of breath just walking around or going up stairs, and dizzy if I bend to pick things up then stand up again. I feel like I'm having this argument inside my head all day every day, "oh that's unusual maybe it's an early pregnancy sign, no dont be ridiculous its practically impossible it's just this other reasonable explanation" but I can't make myself really believe it and I hate to get my Hope'sup so high knowing I'm going to be so devastated when AF arrives. And I can't tell my husband, I feel like I've got no one to talk to about this. It's so difficult.
2 Comments • 6 weeks ago
Hi there! I’m so sorry you’re feeling alone in this situation. Truth is that implantation could occur anywhere from 6dpo to 12DPO and any symptoms before that is unlikely to be related with pregnancy although many ladies in the past claimed they knew even since 1dpo... women’s body is really so difficult to read since early pregnancy and period symptoms are most of the times identical.
I know how it feels to be obsessive over every little symptom since I’ve been there more times I want to admit. It’s a real torture and I really hope you’ll find some ways to keep you distracted till you can test or till af due day!
I wish you’ll get the results you’re waiting for and hopefully you and your hubby will find a way to make this work!!
This site is full of lovely and very supportive ladies and I’m sure you can always come here and pull things out of your chest.
Good luck hun!!!
41 days ago • Edited
Thank you, I really appreciate your compassion. I'm 11dpo today and really trying not to obsess because it's pointless, but it's so hard to silence that "what if" voice. I took a test today to prove to myself I'm being crazy and of course its negative, I'm getting dull cramps now that likely indicate AF too so I do know its just been me looking for signs. I know from my job that it's easy to find or amplify physical symptoms if you look for them, the mind is powerful like that. Its just hard to remember to apply that same logic to my personal life!
All of my mum friends are completely done having children, or I have a few friends who aren't at the baby stage of their lives yet. No one understands. I initially spoke to my mum a lot but she got so upset for me that she tried to "help" by basically guilting my husband about it which, whilst well intentioned, was definitely unfair. I don't speak to DH because we've talked so much about it and we've both tried to understand each other, be supportive etc, but I know it makes him uncomfortable that I'm struggling. He has requested a vasectomy but itll likely be the end of the year at the earliest before it gets done with all the waiting list delays at the moment so I guess I'm in for a whole year of wishing for some sort of miracle. And I hate to write this here too because I know I'm so lucky and it sounds horribly ungrateful to be longing for another like this. There was a time I thought I wouldn't have one baby, let alone three. So I feel guilty for feeling this way too. But there it is, I can't help how I feel.
39 days ago • Post starter
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