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UGH I am done with testing!! What a joke! On 11dpo I got a very very faint pink shadow of a line, then since then all clear bfn's!!! I am so frustrated! And then today my bbt dropped below coverline.... so af will probably be here tomorrow... mother nature is such a bitch!

I love this thread! I've been on a few other TTC forums, but none seem to have as much traffic. So my frustrations for today!

1. Seriously, how do some of these people get pregnant out there that clearly do NOT deserve children? Like the mother that I saw smoking while pregnant. Like the mother screaming at her child in Walmart...

2. I HATE when I'm told "dont worry about it. you are still young" or "stop stressing, it will happen when you least expect it." Hello, I think my stressing is quite reasonable. Its been ten months. No one in my family has ever had problems TTC. So why me?

3. I'm so tired of being stressed by this. Work is suffering, my attitude is suffering, and the 9 lbs I lost on Weight Watchers is back from stress eating. :(

4. The 2200 sq ft three bedroom home we bought to fill up with children seems so empty and lonely...

5. The calls to my grandmother who always asks, "are the twins here yet?" Just because I'm taking Clomid doesnt mean I'm going to have twins, but asking about it every other week is making me more depressed!

Whew. Thanks for letting me get it out!

lilypad - Welcome!

Ugh I totally second everything you said!

We bought a beautiful 3 bedroom home as well, and have a baby room already set up, all we're missing is the baby.

My Grandma does essentially the same thing... every time I see her (which is at least once a week) she says "any news...?" Like I need a reminder that I am a failure in that department.

I am in such a horrible mood today...

Rant for the day - so I went out today and everywhere I looked their were women with babies or baby bumps. I have a mix of emotions. Angry that im not pregnant. Sad that im not pregnant. Scared that I will never be pregnant. Angry that it seems to happen so easily for others and not for me. Just feeling frustrated. Also the more pregnant people your around the more heavily not being pregnant weighs you down.

quoth, you hit the nail on the head!

My Dh and I walked into our neighborhood bar, yes where everyone knows our name... and as we walked in everyone said "Congratulations!" to us. I was completely baffled and turned to my DH and asked him what everyone was talking about. He seemed just as lost as I was. It later came out that they thought we were pregnant! All I could do is tell my dh that I wanted to go home. Where did all of this come from? Why would they think that we were pregnant? I was just heartbroken and cried myself to sleep. I don't know where any of this came from, but it hurt my heart.

Lily: Soooo agreeing with you. Everyone around me is asking when, when, when? It just makes me want to cry. Especially when my FIL asks. He is 88 and want to see our baby before he dies.

Like all of you, I'm just exhausted with putting on a fake smile and hiding the hurt and pain and saying " We are working on it." or "When it happens, it happens." or "We aren't preventing!" It's just so heartbreaking, frustrating, agonizing, irritating and well, exhausting. It's almost like some people don't get it that it can take time and it's not like we can just turn a switch to "pregnant" and there it is. Ugh If it was only so easy - BUT IT'S NOT SO QUIT ASKING!!!

Ok. breathing now.

I totally have to get in on this action! I love my husband to pieces but when I start my TTC rant or bawl session and he gets those hurt puppy dog eyes (cuz ya know it's not like it's something he can just fix unlike my car!) it just kills me to see so I have stopped.
ME: I'll be 22 in a few weeks, my DH is 27 and we have been married for almost 2 years. We have been TTC since June 2011 off of BCPs and all of my closest friends know that we are TTC including parents on both sides.
I have a rant for the kitty (hope you enjoy because this one is like the burr that is under the horses saddle that eventually leads to him running off the cliff):

I have to take out as much identifying information as possible so it won't be near as good as if you knew the whole story. ;-)

A girl who shall remain nameless for her protection caused one heck of a disturbance in her family by sneaking off with some random guy she supposedly met online to a far away place that we will call "knocked-up-ville" (oh crap I just spoiled the punchline - oh well you'll still enjoy the story) Disappears for 3 months, comes back from knocked-up-ville .... KNOCKED UP of all things (I know you never saw it coming). Anyway...

She listened to idiot male who convinced her that he was sterile...OBVIOUSLY NOT!!!! so used no protection because it wasn't like risky or anything like that (I would love to know if she ended up with an STD for that) Smoked pot and drank heavily while first pregnant. Managed to get knocked up within a three month window (even though she was well over 100 lbs overweight). (When she found out by accident that we were TTC this was the conversation: Her (H) Me (M) H-You should just do what we did. Have sex everyday. M-That's a little excessive. H-I guess it just depends on who you are with. It wasn't for him.) [I'm not kidding you guys you can't make crap like this up!!]

To date she is on every form of welfare and is living with her parents and keeps postponing having to go back to work because she "doesn't have to", gave up on BFing after 3 days postpartum because she was told that she was starving her baby and shouldn't BF.

Here are the pearls of wisdom to escape her idiotic asinine lips so far: (I love these)
I'm glad I wasn't married when I was pregnant because my parents had already been through it so when I got mad they just let me be mad and throw a fit and then everything was fine.
I'm glad I don't have to go back to work this year it would just be too hard to have to work and be a mother.
The doctor said that she could start solid foods soon (at 4 month checkup). I should mention that not only was it was one of the first times she had cereal, but it was made with formula with mashed up bananas. Do ppl not realize your stomach at any age is the same size as your fist at that age????
Took the car seat out of its base to tilt it back while the car is moving down the road so that she wouldn't get a crick in her arm while she is feeding her and talking to the person in the front seat.
Leaves the baby at home for her mom to watch while she goes out because it's too hard to take her out of the house.
If she spit up at all she would give her more formula bc she would be hungry again too soon.
She told me how fortunate I was to not have kids because I have no idea how much they cost (after she dropped $200 welfare on professional pictures, baby boots and a tu-tu.)
This one is good. At one point she took the baby from someone else, handed the baby to her mom so that she could place a blanket in the swing and then took the baby from her mom and put her in the swing and then asked her mom to rock the swing! I'm sorry but that one just kinda set me on edge so what's a good TTC girl gonna do but make a point, so...a little while later I held her daughter, cut a pan of brownies, got my own plate and served myself without any problems while cradling the baby in one arm and talking to her. I know it made me feel better too! :-)

Now you tell me how any of this is fair, right, just, or even remotely conceivable (no pun intended) that a married couple who have a great relationship (if I do say so myself), and are financially good. No debt, good income, great budgeting, own sensible cars, etc. and who take all the extra pains to be fit and healthy are having such trouble getting pregnant but some uneducated teen can go and get knocked up and not be prepared, or educated, or anything...

(And......discuss! .... Go!)

mrslong, that is incredible!!! What kills me the most is the parents of this girl who are just allowing he to act that way. Make her shape up or stop making it so easy for her. I work as an infant teacher in a early head start/daycare center and I see thinks like this on occasion. It breaks my heart to have to watch these people use the system simply because they were able to get knocked up and I'm not.

My sister is kinda in the same boat as this girl except she's older than me. She broke up with her long time bf/fiance and within 5 months she was pregnant. Doesn't know who the father is and is now living in my mom & step dads house. I think the only reason I can handle it sanely (word?) is because we live three hours away and only come to visit every so often. I am already dreading christmas if dh and I do not have any baby news by then.

But this is certainly the right place to come and vent about this chick! We all have someone we know that we can relate this story to I guess. It sucks but when each one of us finally does get out BFP AND bring home that bundle of joy we will appreciate it that much more. I can't believe I said that, must be because thats all anyone tells me in person when I complain about this TTC crap! Sheesh!

My current complaint is my friggin BBT!!! Usually when AF comes it plummets back to my normal 96.5-ish temp. But noooo, it only dropped to 97.03 and has risen since then to 97.73 on day 2 and 4. I woke up late on day 3 and forgot to do my temp. My cycle was kinda light too. The idea that I could be pregnant is in my mind but I took soooooo many tests before AF arrived that were definitely negative I really doubt I am. Only symptom I can say I've been having is the urge to pee but I've been drinking a lot of fluids too!

Hi ladies!

Becca - Ugh I hear ya girl... they're EVERYWHERE!

Ayrian - Oh sweetie! Thats horrible! You should get your dh to ask where your friends got this idea from! That was just cruel... first of they dont KNOW if your pg until you tell them, and if you WERE pg YOU deserve to be the ones to announce! So no matter what they were thinking it was cruel!

mrslong - Ugh people like that just piss me off!! It really is not fair how some people get it go easily and dont appreciate it at all, where as all of us who are dying to be mom's cant seem to make it happen. And bumbles right... we ALL have someone in our lives we can relate to on this!! Grrr....

Bumble - FX your have a baby before Christmas! What a crappy situation! Sorry about your bbt... mother nature loves to screw with us!

AFM - I am having similar bbt issues.... it was below coverline so I figured af should be here today, but then today it shot back up to 98.13! what the heck?? Lord knows I have taken enough hpts recently to rule that option out so why must mother nature be so cruel??

Joy

Thanks guys! :-) I know there are a lot of crazy MILs out there and mine usually fits the bill until she all of a sudden like breaks out in a brief clip of sanity and then its back to crazy town. So our most recent conversation went something like this:

Her (H) Me (M)
H- I was shopping at goodwill the other day and I couldn't pass this up (pointing to the basket of baby clothes). So-and-so (a friend who just had a baby and another friend 3 weeks til go time ) just LOVES used clothes (a total dig on me because I do have a problem with buying all used clothes for my children. I get that when they are small it's a lifesaver because they go through clothes so fast but seriously it's not your business what I like or don't like) so I went shopping and look at what I found!
M- Oh, that's cute. Oh, how adorable. Oh that would look just precious on her......
H- Ok and I found these shoes (patent leather mary janes - in all honesty they were freaking adorable but what else can you say about a pair of size 6 black patent leather mary janes??) and they are like $20 shoes I got them for just a couple bucks. Aren't they adorable? I just love them.
M- Yes. What size are they? They would probably fit (another) so and so's little girl.
H- Well, do you want me to save them for you?
M- They would probably have to sit for quite a while. (laughing - get it - NO GUARANTEE IT'LL BE A GIRL!!!!!)
H- You just say you want me to and I will.
M- You can do whatever you want with them.
H- Then I'll just hang onto them for you.
-----

Truly the only thing that we have in common is that at one point in her life she too charted BBT (in hopes of not getting pregnant). The difference between me and her - my husband is here because she thought she was safe because her temp went up one day (which basically translates to she had sex the one day she could get pregnant and DID), and she never ever ever wanted children and convinced her sons (i said sons because my BIL is here because the condom broke once - yes once - it's no wonder to me that at 58 years old she is still ovulating - it's the DNA that won't DIE!!!) that they didn't either until of course my husband got out from under her thumb and realized that children are the best and most precious gift on the planet. He refuses to go home more than a couple times a year and we live an hour away...

The moral of this story.....lock her up and throw away the key! I could handle her if she was just disparaging about me and a witch to me but no she is evil (and I mean evil) to my husband. Telling him how he was going to screw up his life marrying me (makes you feel all warm and fuzzy doesn't it), and that having children would make him miserable (gee grandma - thanks!), and how his deadbeat brother is so accomplished because he finally graduated high school in his 20s and finally got a job at a fast food restaurant for like 10 hours a week, whereas my husband graduated at 17, and started working for the same company at 18 (the youngest they would hire) and has been there for almost 10 years and never gets in trouble, has a great head on his shoulders, not in debt, helpful, kind, ya know the kind of guy that people coined the phrase "all the good ones are either married...." for. She kills me and the worst part is that he is EXACTLY like his dad and his dad is just a wonderful person - not that we ever get to see him because his dad hightails it out of the house as soon as he gets up and doesn't come home until dinner time...(you're shocked I know)

done for today. you guys are great!