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FEELING LEFT OUT????????????

Well nothing again last cycle and I will admit I felt some kinda way, especially because I did every ridiculous thing I read online that people did for them to get pregnant. I put my legs up in the air forever lol till my back hurt, I bought a pineapple almost everyday because I read it helps with implantation and nothing. When I was in my dpo stage this time I was on vaca and I was relaxed and was having fun and I thought this was it I swore this was the time and then AF showed up right on time like normal and I was really upset this time. I just laid on the bed and cried and just felt so bad. What made it worse i that all the forums and groups i'm apart of are all getting their BFPs except me. Everyone that started the TTC journey with me now have moved on and I feel kinda left out. Everyone is talking about their babies and stuff and i'm so happy for each of them I really am I still wish it was me deep down inside. In October it will be a year when I got my first BFP and in Nov it would mark a year that we lost the baby, I cant believe it's been a year already, I swear sometimes it feels like it was yesterday. I decided that I was not doing any stupid tricks and all I was going to focus on is my supplements and my Opks and temping. I didn't even want to take my herbs any more I ran out and I just thought what's the point. I know have had high days for about 8 days now and i'm so over it and prob like last cycle go ten days of high and finally a peak. I'm just getting tired I guess of all this already, it's a lot to handle and deal with especially the BFNs every month. I'm not ready to quit yet that's for sure just ready for it to happen already, but I have no control at all and it sucks

1 Comment • 8 years ago

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