Community post

Hi:

I'm 36yo and ttc #2 after having my 1st 13 years ago. Yes, I must be out of my mind. anyway - I have always wanted another child and my husband did not. then in January 2011 I found out I was pregnant and sadly had a miscarriage 2 months later. My husband became used to the fact that he was about to be a father again while I was pregnant and agreed to continue to ttc after the miscarriage. Unfortunately it's been 9 cycles and nothing.

There are times when I think to myself "Is this what I really want?" and the other thoughts of having to do it all over again etc. And then I realized that I continually had those thoughts when AF showed up - which told me that it was my way of making the show of AF a little easier for me, if that makes any sense.

Remember that the "baby" responsibilities of getting up all every night and changing diaper etc. is temporary and for a very short time. I remember all of the stages that I have been through with my son and think how amazing it is to see another human being develop with my help (I have NEVER been around children until I had my son) . Every time my son says or does something I can see a little piece of me or my husband and I can't even explain how amazing it is. I never could have imagined that I would love something/someone so much in my life.

Remember all of this when you have the thoughts of being unsure.

Hope this helped.

Here's my thought to you:

For me, when I was thinking about ttc again at 40 :), I wanted it and then panicked. I had this realization of running a marathon, where I can see the finish line when all of the sudden - they push it back another 26 miles. What? It scared me! My kids are so self sufficient - life seems so easy. My two wonderful children are older - one in college and one about to go to college. I kept wondering, "what am i thinking"? :)

Here's what I was thinking - There is nothing better that we will ever look back on in our lives than our children. It's really what it's all about you know...life's not about our jobs or our houses - our fondest memories are of our beautiful children and the time we struggled, giggled and grew with them. I don't know about you, but for me- Bless me again with the most wonderful journey I've ever been a part of..!

May you find your way...either one, will be right for you! :)

Thank you!

Hi Lilly Loo, I'm just wondering whether you decided to keep trying or not? I'm 36 and would love to have a third, but worry about going back to the baby stage (actually it's my husband that worries!). I found your post and wondered what happened (hope you don't mind me asking!) Thanks & I hope it all worked out well for you either way! :)