Community post
Needing to book specialist appointment
Well after 10 months of TTC we have finally had enough of the BFN tests and decided to go ahead and book a private consultant for an appointment to discuss our fertility issues. I have had one child from a previous relationship 8 years ago and 2 x miscarriages, but in our current relationship we havent had even a sniff of a postitive.
Our friends who announced they were pregnant about the same time we were trying are now due in 2 weeks, and although we are really happy for them, we cant help but feel gutted that nothing is working for us.
We have mixed feelings about going to the specialist, obviously we will be happy to have some help but we are worried they will be judgemental because we are under 30, or that they might find something seriously wrong with either of us, and how much its all going to cost.
We have decided not to tell anyone we are going for treatment, in case something happens, so its really isolating not having someoen to talk to.
2 Replies • 9 years ago
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Replies (sorted by laughs)
((hug))
Yes, I can relate. I've been trying with my husband for ten months as well. I suspect I have hormonal issues preventing me, but since my DH had a VR, it could be him too. OR, we could have just not been lucky yet. But after ten months, the waiting and disappointment is hard.
I get the privacy thing though too. When everyone knows you want another child and are trying, it is sad to have them know your disappointments too. even their silence feels like pity or indifference and you know they are thinking "it'll never happen" even though they don't vocalize it, cuz it is what I think at times!
I've been afraid to go see a specialist though, for fear of hearing that there IS a significant problem we can't overcome naturally, and that it will be too expensive for us to try the other means of having a baby. So, I think you and your husband are brave and extra credit to the husband for being willing to be checked to see if there is something wrong with him too! That takes real courage for a man to be willing to examine such things...it is easier I think for us women in some ways. We almost expect it to be with us somehow...
Anyways, I hope your story is like some others that about the time you are desperate enough to try something else, you end up with good news all on your own!
9 years ago
Hi,
I completely understand where you're coming from. DH and I are both in our 20's and have been trying for about 14 months now without any sort of positive. We finally decided to see a specialist last month to see if there is anything wrong that would prevent us from getting pg or if it's just been bad luck so far.
I've done all of my initial tests and we are now waiting on DH's appointment before we go in to hear about the results. Thes best part about where we went was that they gave us a booklet that explained most of the tests they use and what the most likely treatment options are. It was a bit of a relief that most of the treatments are reasonable and not overly invasive before they go to the really expensive stuff.
I still get stressed about thinking what the problems may be but until the test result come back in I try not to think about it.
Either way, you are not alone. I wish you a lot of Hopefully you'll get your soon without any intervention.
9 years ago
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