Community post

Good way to respond to shower invitations?

To anyone who has invited me to their baby shower,
First of all, I appreciate that you thought of me when planning this special day. Unfortunately, I will not be able to attend your shower or anyone else's in the foreseeable future. You see, for the past 2 1/2 years, my dear husband and I have been trying, and unable, to conceive a child of our own. We have been through 8 rounds of fertility drugs so far, each of which comes with the ups and downs of hope and negative pregnancy tests. There is no way to describe the sadness one feels when failing at our most basic human instinct, to procreate.
You may think it's selfish of me, but it's not that I resent you or wish you weren't having a child...in fact, quite the opposite! I am thrilled that you are building a family and are bringing everyone together to
celebrate. I am unable to attend not because of jealousy, but because such situations only remind me of my own personal failures regarding conceiving a child. I really wish I could come, I do. But I fear that attending wouldn't be very meaningful if I have to quietly excuse myself to go cry in the car (which sometimes I do even at non-baby-related events).
I don't wish to take the focus away from your wonderful blessing. I just wanted to express how desperately I want to be there for you, but I can't. I hope you can understand.

All my love,
Leah

TTC since September 2012

1 Reply • 9 years ago

0 0 0 0