Community post
TTC cycle #26...Cyst?!
This is my 2nd attempt of this journal. Stupid site booted me right when I went to post it. I swear that is the one thing I really hate about this site. :(
I also really HATE my bad luck!!! AF arrived so the 2nd IUI didn't work this time. I am CD 4 today. I can't continue with another IUI yet because I went in for my day 3 ultrasound and found out that I have a leftover cyst from my previous cycle. So the doc has me on BCP's for 3 weeks and then I go in for another ultrasound to see if it worked.
I am getting pissed off at everything and everyone. I am pissed off at my bad luck. I am pissed off that I am 38 years old. I am pissed off at DH for not listening to me 4 years ago when I suggested that we start TTC because part of me knew we were going to have problems. I am pissed off at my parents for not being supportive enough when I was a teenager when I got knocked up and told me to abort it. (I was in therapy for years hearing that it will happen when the time is right...I am pissed off at the Therapists and Parents for telling me that too). I am pissed off at all the women around me able to get pregnant so easily and here I am struggling. (Of course not the ladies on here who have been trying for a long time) And worst of all I am pissed off at myself for being pissed off.
I know I need to channel anger into something else. Maybe I should start walking and working out again. Maybe I should start punching the bag again.
My fear is that I don't see myself pregnant anymore. I used to dream about it and get excited because I could picture myself pregnant and what I would do when I was pregnant. I just don't see it anymore. I pray it's just a moment of depression and that it changes soon but at the moment I feel like it's never going to happen.
*BABY DUST*
3 Comments • 9 years ago
0
Pregnancy test calculator
Use this calculator to help you decide when to take your first home pregnancy test.
Comments
hun i am also struggling when a 10 cm that just keeps coming back, am schedule for removal now. I know what you are going through, it pains everywomen who wants to be a mommy when it doesn't happen soon enough. I always get strength from women who have tried 3/4 years when they finally get their bfp. It will happen for us as well. jst doing stop fighting for what you really need, being a mommy.
9 years ago
Early pregnancy symptoms by day past ovulation
What signs and symptoms are most common on each day past ovulation?
More Journal posts
