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Becoming a NICU Mom (part 1)-

This is a summary of my first pregnancy. I kept my journal updated up to the beginning when I had a SCH. Little did I know this would be the beginning of a harrowing trip down pregnancy lane. I bled for the first trimester. I had several SCHs, come to find out. When I made it to my second trimester, I was finally in the clear.... until I hit 32 weeks. This is my experience:

When I was 32 weeks pregnant I started having contractions and I was @ 3cm. After the contractions started, I was in and out of l&d for weeks. I would see my Dr, she'd send me to the hospital.. rinse and repeat twelve times. I was on strict bed rest. Only allowed to stand to go to the bathroom. The contractions never did stop. I was in active labor non-stop for four more weeks. At 35+6 my water broke. I was told to head to the hospital immediately. They induced me pretty quickly bc my baby was having major decels. In all honesty, my labor and delivery were pretty magical. I got the epi before the pitocin and never was in much pain. I quickly got to 10 without even puking. I pushed for all of half an hour and I had my beautiful 7lb15oz boy at 36 weeks on the dot. He was given oxygen right away, but deemed fine and was taken off almost as quickly. He was sent to the NICU for observation and then allowed to be with me after 3 hours. This is when everything went awry. It was the first night with him and I hadn't slept in over 36 hours. He was crying inconsolably. He wasn't hungry, he wasn't cold, he wasn't lonely. Then it dawned on me. That God awful noise. That sound when he tries to breathe... Like a whistle. Like a baby who can't breathe. Oh God. What do I do. What is wrong. I call my nurse in. I tell her he can't breathe. She looks at him, says, "ok, we'll saline and suck and see where that goes." She wheels his bassinet out of my room. I'm left standing there clutching his little cap. I call my husband and tell him I need him to get there ASAP. Something is wrong with our baby. I have a bad feeling. He tells me I'm overreacting. He says he has work the next day, he can't come. I beg. I plead. I tell him I know there is something wrong. He gives in and comes. By the time he gets there it has been an hour and a half. I know something has happened. I know it doesn't take that long. Immediately a nurse I've never seen comes through my door.

Story continued in my next journal entry.

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