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Anyone late 30's and up trying to conceive again? :) Pt.2

Category: Trying to Conceive - Trying For Another
Posted by lisserb » Apr. 26, 2012 9:50am

Part 2 of the original "Anyone 38 and higher trying to conceive again? :)" thread started in Feb.

Here's part one of the thread:
http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/forum/post.php?postid=8372

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lisserb
Posts: 1516
Reply by lisserb » Apr. 26, 2012 10:02am

Congrats to all the ladies who got their BFP's on the last thread!

Here's hoping that the good luck and baby dust keep flowing and we all get ours soon!

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lisserb
Posts: 1516

Reply by esperanza » Apr. 26, 2012 10:06am

Sadly, I am still here...
looks like had another very early mc last cycle
last cycle I Ov-ed early on CD 11, and AF came on CD 21; second day of AF suddenly start being abnormally heavy, overnight pad didn't last for 20 min., so I went to emergency, blood test found small (but more than 10) HSg so...but bleeding stopped, next day everything was ok except my emotional state...I have to admit that I didn't recover from previous mc and another one put me even more down - I am still struggling to being ok emotionally and control excessive crying..so considering my emotional state I don't have any expectation fot this cycle
cd 9, approaching O (have no idea when to expect it) so I started opk earlier,
we also bd a lot recently not for conceiving purposes but because it makes me feel better and helps me to forget my sorrows

lisserb, how are you? do you think you've recovered after loss?

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esperanza
Posts: 175

Reply by alfiet » Apr. 26, 2012 10:27am

im nearly 39 and ttc i have 1 daughter aged 11 and 2 step sons that are my partners...we decide last year to try for our own baby had a miscarriage a few months ago but suffer from hughes syndrome..its a condition to do w ith clotting of the blood so it was a big decision to go for it again nearly finished my AF which was a chemical pregnancy ...so fingers crossed for our own baby soon :0)

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alfiet
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Reply by lisserb » Apr. 26, 2012 10:38am

I'm so sorry Esperenza. Big Hugs.

I am being really philosophical about my loss, but I think another one on right on top of the last would be a very bitter pill to swallow, and would not help with my emotional state either. I'm so sorry you have had to go through this again, right back to back with the other one.

I'm doing okay. I'm moving forward because that is the only way I can go. I have to look at it as though my life is no different now than it was on February 2nd when I did the IUI. My day to day life has not changed, my future has not changed, and my plans for moving forward have only slightly altered. I still get sad when I think about what could have been, and I allow myself a few minutes of that time then I choose to put my chin up and keep on going. I have to do that for me. I can't let myself sit in the grief, though I definitely still do have my times of grieving.

I think having another loss so soon though, would be very difficult to pull out of. Take time to grieve Esperenza. Sending you thoughts and hugs.

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lisserb
Posts: 1516

Reply by NipplzMcGee » Apr. 26, 2012 12:02pm

I am!
I am 38, DH is almost 40 (sunday!) and we ae ttc our second together. We each came into the marriage with 3 kids from our first marriages. Our dd is 7. The other children are 21, 21, 19, 19, 16, and 10.
Some think we are crazy for "starting over" but I don't let it get to me- its my life.
Currently, I am 3dpo on my first medicatyed cycle ever. We had a loss at 12w and it really messed up my system. I took clomid 100mg 3-7, repronex d10, and a hcg trgger shot d11. I released three (!) follicles, and we are hoping one takes. I'm anxious for May 5 to get here so 'i can test- although I don't know if I can wait that long, but I am afraid of the false positive.

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NipplzMcGee
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Reply by torontochick » Apr. 26, 2012 3:13pm

So sad to hear about your losses lisserb, Esperanza and nipplz. I hope that you get to post your BFPs soon in this new thread. At least we got really good pregnancy vibes from all the BFPs coming in.

For me, this is our 12th cycle TTC. I am in the middle of stimulation for our 3rd ICSI attempt. I think this is our last attempt as we are all out of povket using up my partner's savings. Last option would be donor egg, but my son is from a previous relationship and I would really, really want him to have at least a half-sibling...

I guess, I am the oldest of the "fine wine ladies". I know my time to have a baby is almost up (or may be already :( ). I am turning 43 in 3 months.

Hope to see everyone here in the new thread and of course some new TTC buddies, too!!

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Me: 43 DBF: 49
13 unsuccessful cycles TTC
IVF #3:
u/s 8w2d: bean stopped growing, no hb , 06/21 D&C
IVF #4 BFP - it's a girl!
06-03-2013 Fiona Isabel was born

torontochick
Posts: 430

Reply by airiesing » Apr. 26, 2012 5:25pm

Hello ladies, just popping in to give you the update........

Looks to be another singleton for us! To be honest, I'm relieved. So many things involved that say it's better for us all the way around. But things look to be going swimmingly! 147bpm & measures right to date! I go back in 2 weeks. Aaaaaaand now I can exhale

Keeping you all in my thoughts & prayers. For those of you who have had losses, I've been there, there is always hope! It's such a personal journey. for us we know this will be our last shot, regardless of the outcome. so we'll just keep the praying going!!!

For the rest (and for all) here's an official screen "belly rub" hoping to spread some pregger vibes!!!


Cheers!

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Me: almost 42 (May)
DH: 42
DD: soon to be 3 (also May!) Honeymoon baby conceived at 38, born at 39
08/11 mc 9.5 weeks. Lost heartbeat, growth stopped 7.5 weeks d&c 11weeks
02/12 chemical pg 4 weeks + 4 (surprise pg)
04/12 BFP!! EDD 12/09/12 PLEASE GOD! PRAISE GOD!!
My cocktail:prenatal baby aspirin EPO cd1-O B-100 maca, vitex green tea
Now: Prometrium 100mg, by mouth, 2x a day





airiesing
Posts: 229

Reply by MountainMama » Apr. 26, 2012 9:07pm

I do not know where to start. I have so very much to say.

On miscarriage:

I have had 4 or 5 miscarriages. All but one of them at 5 weeks or less. I may now, as in right this minute, be having a 6th. I hope not but I came home from dropping the kids at school to find pink cm when I wipe. Still hoping for a sticky bean! I have never spotted before with a pregnancy. Dh still thinks I am pregnant. He says I still smell pregnant and not like AF at all. (He has a nose like a bloodhound and could tell by smell when I became pregnant a few years ago. We lost that baby at 8 weeks.)

My first miscarriage was the most devastating and the most uplifting and transformative experience of my life.

My DS was still nursing and my cycle had not returned as yet when I realized that I was pregnant again. I took a hpt around 11dpo and it was a BFP. A week later the gnarliest AF came around and that is when the docs explained early m/c to me.

I literally tore at my hair and wailed to the sky. I was inconsolable and then sometime in the afternoon, after my wasband took DS out of the house to escape me I had an...experience.

It was my DD's "spirit". She told me that something hadn't been right with the pregnancy, that she loved me and that she would be back to be with me and the family.

Talk about being gobsmacked! I had never had any kind of experience like that before but I was left with such a feeling of peace and love and goodness that it really lifted my spirits and gave me an unshakeable belief that all was well and all would be well and I would see my little girl.

After two more miscarriages, I finally had that sticky bean and 9 months later, I gave birth to the little girl I had been waiting for.


Today's acupuncture appointment:
As you might imagine, after this morning's continued flow of pink cm, I had my panties in a twist to such as extent that I begged my dh to stick with me for the day as we worked from home. He has been such a rock of stability for me of late and I am so thrilled that the closeness we have developed through our ttc journey has opened my eyes so I better appreciate this side of him.

Last week's acupuncture treatment had left me feeling jittery and disorganized. I didn't want a repeat of that experience and was prepared to make this my last appointment if there was a repeat.

O. M. G!

I again had an amazing, self-empowering and transformative experience today on the treatment table.

Last week's problem is that I had a needle in place that I did not need. That happened again today, but this time I knew enough to speak up about it. When the dr first started applying the needles I felt this incredible upwelling of flow moving through, above and across my body. But then he put a needle in a place that shut all of that flow down, making me feel dead rather than alive inside.

When I mentioned this to him, he removed the offending needle and the shifting flow started up again. It was nearly overwhelming, almost stifling and then I realized...I realized I needed to stop standing in my own way in my ttc journey. Too much obsessing, too much worrying about things which aren't important, not enough trusting myself and my inner wisdom and very little taking care of myself in the ways that need to happen, first for my own growth and well-being and second, in order to conceive.

See, even though I am eating well, taking prenatals and supplements, doing acupuncture, etc. I continue to let small things upset me and focus on matters which can either take care of themselves or aren't that important in the scheme of growing my family.

And as I found these insights, I realized there were some important guide posts or principles or ideas that I wanted both in my life and for this coming baby:

Wisdom
Love
Heart
Perseverance
Loyalty
Luck

And as I repeated these ideas to myself, I could feel the flow move from stifling, drowning and choking me to sinking into my bones, my cells and my self. And I felt an amazing, pervasive sense of rightness and that all would be well and even my womb stopped feeling like it was at war with me and possibly miscarrying to feeling like one of the best parts of me and that it was ticking along great and...

I still carry that delicious sense that all is right in the world. I know that a baby is coming to dh and I. And I am at peace in a way that I had no idea that I previously had been so far from.

So.

I don't know if I am miscarrying right now. I may be. I may not be. What I do know is that great things are happening and I am so looking forward to continuing on this path.

I hope this helps someone,
MM

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MountainMama
--
41 year old mom of 2 (15yo DS and 11yo DD)
EDD 4/25/2013 with my #3 and dh's #1
Thank you, CTP sisters!


MountainMama
Posts: 53

Reply by angel197088 » Apr. 26, 2012 9:11pm

To all y'all that have gone through the losses, I have been there is well. Allow yourself time to grieve your loss. I was an emotional wreck, with my last mc at 9wks, and one prior at 8 wks, and prior to that one at 20wks. It was hard for me to hold it together for my family's sake, but I needed that alone time as needed to just b alone, cry and grieve. When I realized that I needed to really truly put it all in God's hands, was when I finally had some peace. And 4 mths later we concieved our lil man who is going to be 1 on May 2. There is always hope.

torontochick, hey there now chin up, I'm right behind ya, 41 almost 42, and hubby is going to b 44 this fall.

airiesing CONGRATS, so happy for you that all looks good. I had been thinking of you and praying. :)

I think I have a very faint pos, everyone sees it here, (yes i just had to poas) I can see it but so afraid to let myself believe it as it is still early, and when I got my hopes up this early it was a CP, but oh lordy am I sicker than a dog, and hotter'n a goats butt in a pepper patch, among other symptoms. It seems different this time, like my other pregnancies.



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angel197088
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Reply by angel197088 » Apr. 27, 2012 9:20pm

ok if anyone can help, I would greatly appreciate any thoughts as I am totally confused! according to FF bbt chart I am 10 dpo and O'd on cd 7. Yesterday, it stated in observations that my chart was now possible triphasic. Now today FF is still saying all this and looks good, but when I put my temp in on the chart here, it changed my O day to cd 15 and that I am 3 dpo. Which one to do I go by or just is it just a wait and see if AF shows her ugly face either on May 1st or May 8th? This is only my 2nd cycle charting so this has me rather confused.

I took another test and doesn't seem to b anything there this time. so a neg test today. but lots and lots of symptoms, uggghhh.

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angel197088
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Reply by mama_belle3 » Apr. 28, 2012 8:09pm

MMama: Thanks for sharing your insight and I'm praying for you.

40&SWAY & alfiet: Welcome!

Angel: "There's always hope" - agreed! I haven't taken the test again. Scared of a . Maybe tomorrow.

Air: Yay for exhalin' . . . breathe, breathe! Thanks for the thoughts and prayers. I haven't tested a second time, I'm not completely believing the BFP I saw the other day.

Esperanza: Big hug, sistah!

Nipplz: "It's my life, it's now or never . . . I ain't gonna live
forever . ." Sorry couldn't resist. I turned to this website for a
similar reason. I had a friend who wanted me to stop ttc/obsessing for awhile after my mc. I get where she is coming from but I needed to find people who understand. This is a great thread/group of ladies!

AFM: Nothing really just wanted to comment on a few posts. I'll be poas again soon - not sure this is it. So I'm holding off for now.

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mama_belle3
Posts: 40

Reply by hopefulat40 » Apr. 29, 2012 4:39pm

MMama...How are you - thinking of you and praying for a sticky bean!

Lisserb..You are strong and you must keep preservering! :) That's what we do for our children! xxo

Aireising..Keep smiling!! So excited for you!

Mama belle and angel...Fingers crossed!!!!

40&SWAY & alfiet...Welcome! :)

I am either 6 or 7dpo today. Missed enjoying my sweet husband on ovulation day, but did have some time together before I left for a few days. No new signs, did see the cutest little pair of baby booties in Target today! Yes, I actually picked them up! :) Made me realize that all of the hardwork, heartache, tears and joy are worth every bit of it! I want to put these little booties on tiny little feet! So I will keep trying ... and smiling at myself...

All else is well here! Sending baby dust and sticky vibes to all the fantastic wise ladies on this thread!

T

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hopefulat40
Posts: 64

Reply by mommymayer » Apr. 30, 2012 2:29pm

To all of you out there who are going through the pain of mc. Mine was just before 12 weeks in February. Give it time...

So happy for all of you with the good news.

MountainMomma praying for you....

I got a smiley face on Saturday morning and it was gone by dinner that day. I hope all our hard "work" will pay off!

Please keep all the emotions flowing, it is very healthy to open and share with those around you who feel what you are going through....this is a sisterhood!

Oh btw...I'm already 43 and still trying....keep going ladies!!!



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mommymayer
Posts: 17

Reply by torontochick » May. 1, 2012 8:26am

MountainMama, thank you for your words of wisdom! I am very sure that this little one is going to come to you into this world. Do not worry about pink CM. I had a bit of light bleeding with my son, I don't recall how far along I was - sometime between 8 and 14 weeks, before I had heard a heartbeat. It turned out nothing.

air... congrats on a very strong singleton heartbeat :)

hopeful... crossing my fingers for you... maybe this is the one!

Mommymayer... yes, still here trying, but giving up on "natural"... Currently IVF #3 is underway - egg retrieval should be at the end of this week. Gosh, I hope that this cycle is a BFP!

angel, I was trying to look at your chart, but seems like you haven't put it up on your profile page. I think if your test was positive, you can't possibly be 3 dpo, so the earlier chart was prob correct. FX that this line stays!!!

To all the other ladies... thank you for the great thread and company - we give each other hope!

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Me: 43 DBF: 49
13 unsuccessful cycles TTC
IVF #3:
u/s 8w2d: bean stopped growing, no hb , 06/21 D&C
IVF #4 BFP - it's a girl!
06-03-2013 Fiona Isabel was born

torontochick
Posts: 430

Reply by angel197088 » May. 2, 2012 10:43am

There I think I have it set up right now, so my charts show on my countdown page. if that's what you mean. sorry all new to this, only my 2nd mth, lol.

I'm not quite sure what in the world happened, but didn't get anymore pos after that one, so maybe an evap? now both charts are pretty much the same, only difference is on here it says I am 8dpo and FF says 9dpo. I am getting some steady faint pos. now. hoping and praying this one sticks.

Mountainmama-hope all is well with you, You have been in my thoughts and prayers :)

As well as the rest of y'all :)

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angel197088
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Reply by torontochick » May. 2, 2012 1:06pm

Angel, if you read your OPKs right, I would say that you o'd on CD13. I doubt that the OPK on CD6 was positive. Too early. If you o'd on CD13, you'd be 10 DPO today, which would explain the faint lines. If it's a BFP, the lines should be getting stronger soon... FX!!




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torontochick
Posts: 430

Reply by angel197088 » May. 2, 2012 10:32pm

ok that makes sense, I know I started using soy isoflavones, cd2-cd6, so wasn't sure if maybe it gave a false pos on opk? I use the clearblue digital opks so I don't have to play the guessing game with lines.

But yeppers had faints all day today (but pee was a bit diluted) been drinking alot of water, extremely thirsty with these hot flashes. but a little bit ago, finally got a definite darker line on FRER still faint but easier to see. So scared of another Chemical. but have alot of symptoms and feels different this time. like my other pregnancies. fingers x

Thank you for your help :)

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angel197088
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Reply by Kraken » May. 3, 2012 2:35am

Hi,

ive been watching this thread for a while now. I am 39 and my husband is 36 we have been trying for coming up to 3yrs for a baby together.

We each have a child from previous relationships my daughter is 15 and I fell first time with her. My husband son is 8 and they tried for 6 months.

I am starting to feel 'O' pains in my right side today and they are quite strong so will be jumping on my husband when we get in from work

I have had 1 M/C and two chemical's. It is soooooo hard trying. Every month it takes a bit more out of me and I just loose hope a bit more every time. It got to the point about a month ago that I just didnt want to do it anymore. It kills me to see other pregnant women and babies etc.

I have just had the all clear from having pre-cancerous cells in my cervix and the nurse said that she cant see any reason why it is not happening. she was 37 when she had her first daughter and it took her 3 yrs. She is now 43 and is trying for a second baby. The other two nurses who work there are both in the early 40s and both on maternity leave with newborn babies. So I know it can happen just why is it not happening to us.

Lisser - How you doing hun?



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Kraken
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Reply by hopefulat40 » May. 3, 2012 8:10am

Angel...oh how exciting!! :) Stick bean!! :) Woooo!

Kraken...Welcome - here's where we stay motivated and watch success! This has been a very lucky thread!

Toronto.. What's happening with you?

I am approx 11 dpo - took a test this morning - negative - so I believe I am on to next month! If I don't start Sunday, I will test then! :)

All else is well in the world! My son comes home from college today for the summer! Nice to have everyone back in the house... ahhh.. :)

Happy Thursday ladies!

T

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hopefulat40
Posts: 64

Reply by angel197088 » May. 3, 2012 8:20am

Kraken- hang in there hun will keep you in my thoughts and prayers that it happens for y'all. As Hopeful has said this has been a very lucky thread lately.

Hopeful- Thank you, we are so excited, but scared at the same time. Hoping this lil bean will stick this time. My AF is due on Sunday as well so will breathe a bit more as long as nothing shows. so far so good. Another faint positive again this morning. wooohoooo!!!!!



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