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TTC DEPRESSION

Category: Trying to Conceive - TTC My First Child
Posted by TRENISE » Aug. 18, 2012 7:14am

TTC FOR OVER 2 YEARS NOW. MY HUSBAND AND I ARE GROWING MORE AND MORE APART EACH PASSING MONTH WE TRY AND DONE CONCEIVE. I'M OVERLY DEPRESSED BECAUSE EVERY MONTH I FEEL SOMETHING NEW AND I KNOW THIS IS "IT" THEN HEER COMES "D" DAY AF IS RIGHT ON TIME TO KICK ME IN THE ASS! IWE HAVE TRIED A LOT OF NATURAL THINGS. GOAT WEED, GERITOL CLOMID (NOT NATURAL) I HAD AN ELECTIVE MYOMECTOMY IN EARLY JUNE 2012TO REMOVE A CLUSTER OF FIBRODS. NOW AGAIN THIS MONTH I'M FEELING ALL SORTS OF TWINGES ACHES AND PAINS. I HAVE BEEN ONLINE EVERYDAY FOR HOURS SEARCHING FOR ANY ANSWERS TO MY QUESTIONS BUT I HAVE BEEN ONLY GETTING MY HOPES UPS REALLY HIGH FOR THEM TO COME CRASHING BACK DOWN! MY DOCTOR CLAIMS EVERYTHING IS FINE WITH ME AND MY HUSBAND SO I REALLY DON'T GET WHY WE CAN'T HAVE A BABY!!!!!????? I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO! I'M LOST SAD DEPRESSED AND FEEL SO ALONE! I'M TIRED OF HEARING OTHERS ANNOUNCE "I'M PREGNANT" iI'M TIRED OF GOING TO OTHER PEOPLES BABYSHOWERS! I'M TIRED OFF PEOPLE ASKING ME TO BE THEIR CHILD "GODMOTHER" (DON'T GET ME WRONG I LOVE MY GOD CHILDREN" I HATE SEEING PREGNANT WOMEN EVERYWHERE WISHING IT WERE ME! THIS ISSUE IS REALLY GETTING ME DOWN AND I CAN'T SEEM TO PICK MYSELF UP. I'M AFRAID THAT MY HUSBAND IS GOING TO GET TIRED AND LEAVE TO HAVE A CHILD WITH ANOTHER AND I'LL BE STUCK CHILDLESS AND ALONE. EVERYDAY I PRAY THAT GOD WILL HAVE MERCY ON ME AND BLESS ME WITH A CHILD AND EVERY MONTH I GET TO SIT AND CRY FOR HOURS BECAUSE I DIDN'T CONCIEVE THIS MONTH AND I HAVE TO START THIS EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOSTER ALL OVER AGAIN! I'M LOSING ALL HOPE! I THINK I'M AT THE END OF THIS ROAD. IT'S TO HEART BREAKING TO CONTINUE. I HATE THE WAY I FEEL ALL THE TIME. IT AFFECT MY WORK MY SOCIAL LIFE MY MARRIAGE AND MY RELATIONSHIP WITH FRIENDS AND FAMILY. I FEEL THAT NO ONE UNDERSTANDS THE "PAIN" I GO THROUGH MONTHLY WEEKLY DAILY HOURLY EVERY WAKING MINUTE! IT'S NOT FAIR! I'D BE A WONDERFUL MOTHER!

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TRENISE
Posts: 4
Reply by IceRayven » Aug. 18, 2012 1:49pm

Have you looked into support groups for women who are going through that? Infertility is tough. If it has been so long I would recommend going to a fertility specialist and get testing done.

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IceRayven
Posts: 5

Reply by TRENISE » Aug. 18, 2012 7:06pm

I have thought about it...defeat come to mind when I think about it. But I think that would be my next step. Also I have been searching for support groupd in my area because I don't want my life to stop because of this.

Thank you!!!

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TRENISE
Posts: 4