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Current 11dpo looking for fellow first timers for support

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Hi all, we have been TTC our first for 6 months now and I have been on these boards reading almost every single day, this process has now gotten so obsessive to me my DH is tired of me over analyzing everything only to be let down with a BFN every single month.

I'm 11dpo now, AF is due on Saturday (5/14) and I have taken probably 6 internet cheapies since 9dpo and I keep getting BFN. Every month I feel like I get the symptoms, then just chalk them up to AF time. This month has been a bit different:

0-7dpo: Not much change, I just noticed I was VERY gassy (like I am during AF) and bloated
8dpo: breasts got very tender and I was woken up to cramps during the night.
9dpo: breasts still tender, starting to get noticeable veins, mild cramps on and off again waking me up in the night. BFN (tested today because of Mother's Day, thought it would be a sign and a welcome surprise)
10dpo: Still bloated/gassy, breast tenderness goes down, veins disappearing, thick CM appears BFN
11dpo: Today - breasts only sore to the touch. Still bloated and gassy. No hints of anything else.

I am one who has VERY painful cramps at AF time and never thought I really cramped beforehand, the last few months I've gotten these mild cramps a couple of days early which then led to AF, but this time they were a full 7 days before AF which has never happened and I feel this is making me obsess even more.

I hope you ladies accept me into the community! I just know and hope having some support will help ease my mind and if another BFN pops up I know I will need the help to get through it and start from scratch again :(


713 Replies • 7 years ago


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Hi ladies,

I know I've been REALLY MIA but I've read through all the posts. I'm thinking of you all as we all journey through this. I don't have much to report, except I'm not thinking about this process as I used to. I'm only going to opk but my last FW we had family in town for DH's graduation and I completely forgot to do it. Life is incredibly busy right now, so it just hasn't really be on my mind (maybe that's a good thing right now...)
I had a weird AF show up when I was CD 22, so that was frustrating! Maybe my body is still adjusting to being of BC? We bd'ed once during the FW (the week of graduation-so again SO busy and he was only home the last 4 days of the window) I'm expecting AF Oct. 9, so we'll see. After the fluke AF I feel out of sorts and have no clue what is accurate anymore HA! I'm fully expecting AF to show though.
I'll be checking in occasionally and of course following how you're all doing :)

7 years ago


@babybump- we are totally on the same page- we really want kids, we are sure of that, but we aren't so sure we want to have to resort to feeling like we have become somewhat of a science experiment to have them. My day 3 appt went well- they were really great about DH wanting to wait to do his sperm analysis since he is in the process of quitting- they even offered to get him a prescription for champex to help if he wanted. I am cycle monitoring this month with the clinic and we are going to do the post coital test. The nurse I talked to on Thursday said that if DH was quitting- that the Dr would still likely talk to me about the results when the post coital was completed do find out where all my tests stand (I don't have the results of my AMH test yet). Here we go! Yet another month, hopefully this will be the one!

7 years ago


The waiting game is so hard!!

I am ovulating again so will be waiting for the lovely AF to come again...

Boo!

It is hard before right after AF within 7/8 days I start to ovulate an it worries me too soon after AF? But it is consistent?

7 years ago


Hey ladies, I figured I would update since you have all stuck with me through everything the past few months anyway and it helps my sanity to talk things out. Hubs and I have had some "developments" since the last time I posted. Hubs had some lumps on his neck and went to the doctor, had to have a biopsy etc etc and they say its not a good sign. So we now have another appointment with him this week to see how bad it is and if it has spread. Because of this, I've canceled my saline test appointment because if all of his things lead to what we're thinking, there's a chance he will become permanently infertile and we will never be able to conceive. I spoke to a fertility clinic who looked at his results and upcoming appointments and they recommended a freezing process because we probably won't be able to conceive naturally in time, but with his low count they do not think it will take, so we're going on Friday to get another analysis done and see if there is anything we can freeze in the next couple of weeks for a possible IUI or IVF conception in a couple of months.

Obviously we are hoping we are in very early stages or that it hasn't spread as much as they are thinking and we can avoid the chemo route that makes him infertile, but we won't know that until that Friday appointment with his analysis. I ovulate on Thursday-ish so we're going 100% natural trying this month since it may be our last time and just hoping for the best.


7 years ago • Post starter


Baby bump- will be praying for positive results for you and DH!

7 years ago


Oh Babybump - my heart goes out to you. I really hope that you have caught whatever is going on early and your DH will be healthy soon. I have heard great success stories with couples using frozen sperm. I know its not how you imagined it at all and it will take time to adjust, but hopefully it will mean a happy and healthy DH and baby for you soon. We are here for you if you need to vent or need support when you are at the stage of going through cycles at the clinic. I've actually started listening to a podcast about infertility of all kinds and have been finding it helpful to hear other women's stories about their struggles and successes (https://beatinfertility.co/). Huge hugs, take care of each other.

7 years ago


PS - Good luck Sheena!

7 years ago


I have the best bf....

Today he pointed out a maternity store cute but frustrating

Then he pointed out in our area there is a support group for people who are TTC.....

And tonight mentioned at year mark we can start testing. He was traveling so so much we really only count last month as first month TTC.

I feel pretty lucky having someone so understanding!

7 years ago


Oh Babybump, I'll pray for positive results! I've heard good things about frozen sperm, so I wouldn't count yourselves out yet. I'm sure this is a very difficult time for you and your family. Try to stay positive.

7 years ago


Thank you ladies, it helps having people going through at least SOME of the same things :)

I should be o'ing today, I didn't opk since it wouldn't matter anyway, but I definitely notice a *change* down there this month. Its the end of month 3 of fertilaid which is when they say it really kicks in, so hopefully this is getting some good eggs or whatever it is its supposed to do. DH has his scan today to see how much the cancer is spread in his body which will determine what happens with chemo. We have an appt tomorrow with the fertility clinic to get another analysis done to see if we can freeze any within the next week before a possible surgery. A lot happening, I really didn't want to go the "unnatural" route with it...but I guess when it's the only option you're looking at it makes a lot more sense. The fertility doctor is using phrases like "if you two want biological children this may be your only option" so its pretty jarring. If IVF or IUI is the only option after this month, we've already dedicated a year of time and a lot of money to the process so we will do what we can to make it happen.


7 years ago • Post starter



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