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Current 11dpo looking for fellow first timers for support

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Hi all, we have been TTC our first for 6 months now and I have been on these boards reading almost every single day, this process has now gotten so obsessive to me my DH is tired of me over analyzing everything only to be let down with a BFN every single month.

I'm 11dpo now, AF is due on Saturday (5/14) and I have taken probably 6 internet cheapies since 9dpo and I keep getting BFN. Every month I feel like I get the symptoms, then just chalk them up to AF time. This month has been a bit different:

0-7dpo: Not much change, I just noticed I was VERY gassy (like I am during AF) and bloated
8dpo: breasts got very tender and I was woken up to cramps during the night.
9dpo: breasts still tender, starting to get noticeable veins, mild cramps on and off again waking me up in the night. BFN (tested today because of Mother's Day, thought it would be a sign and a welcome surprise)
10dpo: Still bloated/gassy, breast tenderness goes down, veins disappearing, thick CM appears BFN
11dpo: Today - breasts only sore to the touch. Still bloated and gassy. No hints of anything else.

I am one who has VERY painful cramps at AF time and never thought I really cramped beforehand, the last few months I've gotten these mild cramps a couple of days early which then led to AF, but this time they were a full 7 days before AF which has never happened and I feel this is making me obsess even more.

I hope you ladies accept me into the community! I just know and hope having some support will help ease my mind and if another BFN pops up I know I will need the help to get through it and start from scratch again :(


713 Replies • 7 years ago


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Hey Jenna! Yeah what Sarah said, its just shooting dye in and then looking to see if all the pathways are open. I think it's common for women to get their BFP afterwards because it cleans out their system and opens everything up (if everything is ok that is) - thats the only thing I can think of that it helps get pregnant, its really just checking for problems not really an aid.

My doctor recommended it to me in May, but said it would cost at least $1k and not be covered by insurance, so we opted for a sperm analysis first. Turns out hubs has a low count, so we're on fertilaid to try to fix that and hope that is the only issue, if it still hasn't happened by October she said to come back in for that test if I wanted. So we'll see!


7 years ago • Post starter


Hi All,
So it's 2 dpo for me - the opk's were really helpful to use this month. I actually started doing two a day when the test line started to get darker at cd 11. I am glad I did, I was actually able to catch the LH surge (test line was actually darker than the control line) on the second test for cd12. I would usually test around 2pm and 8pm. By cd 13, there was practically no test liine visable at all! So I am guessing that I ovulated on cd 13. This is actually much early than the last time I used opks (last feb) - which I actually think is a good thing since I only have 26-27 day cycles. We Bd'd cd 8,10,11,12 and 13. Maybe by taking the initiative for the next step will be enough to make this one stick!!!

In the meantime, we finally did make an apt with the fertility clinic, so I am going next Friday. They just sent me the email with all the information and I have to say it's pretty overwhelming. I thought we would chat next week, they would look a tthe tests that I have already done, give me clomid to try for a couple of cycles and then off I go.

That so doesn't appear to be the case. The first cycle you are with the clinic, they call an investigative cycle. I am in Canada, so I have no idea what it's like in the states but here is what they will do during my next cycle (thank god most of it is covered, I have no idea what the out of pocket costs would be otherwise, the total cost of the entire investigative cycle out of pocket for us will be less than $300):

For me (i will basically be a pin cushion for a month):

cd 3 - ultrasounds (internal/external) and full blood workup

at some point between cd 5-10 - hydrosonogram (just the saline injected ultrasound test, not the full dye test) and blood work.

cd 10-18 - every other day ultrasounds and bloodwork (to pinpoint ovulation)

1-2 days before ovulation - post-coital test (basically a pap within 2-8 hours after intercourse) and blood work.

around cd 20 - P4/Progesterone blood test.

cd28- HcG/preg blood test

at anytime during the cycle with one of the blood tests they will check my anti-mullarian hormone levels to check my ovarian reserve (I am actually a little nervous about this one, I started getting my periods around age 10, I am now 35...)

For him:

Semen analysis - they are actually pretty great about this, it doesn't have to be done in the clinic, it can be done at home as long as you can bring it to the clinic within 1 hr of "collection".

I had no idea it would get this intense so quickly, but it will be really great to have answers as to why we haven't concieved yet.

I will keep you all posted with how it goes!

How is everyone else doing?

7 years ago


Wow that is a lot of stuff! But at least that should all definitely give you some answers! I love how you're basically a pin cushion and he's just like "I get to have private time at home and I'm done", guys are so lucky.

Keep us posted on how all of those go! How soon after you get them will they be able to start telling you results?

I'm at 3dpo today so very close to where you're at


7 years ago • Post starter


Twwtoolong- I had all the blood tests and the hsg done as well..i really camped with the hsg but just during it, then was fine after. At least you will get some answers! Good luck and keep us posted!

7 years ago


Yeah- the fellas definitely are lucky on the testing side of things!
They will have a debrief with all the results with me after the cycle is complete- I am sure they will give some feedback during for certain tests. For the hcg preg tests at the end - as long as you are in before 11am for the blood draw they will call you by 2 with the results.

I am kinda wishing that I had done this whole thing while I was on holidays. It's gonna be trickier fitting it around my classes - although I have a wonky schedule this semester and am teaching either later classes (2-4pm, 3-6pm or 4-7pm) or first thing in the morning 8-11am. So I can do mid morning/early afternoon sessions most days.

Luckykap21- how did you find that month of testing? Was it miserable? Thank you for letting me know about the hsg-hopefully I can plan it on a day when I can just go straight home. Did you need to wear pads for a couple of days after or do they remove the fluid for you? Sorry! So many questions!

On a side note - it's 3dpo and I have been having major af type cramps- like the ones I'd have right before/after I start. Trying to not read too much into it- but soooo odd for me!

How are you ladies doing?

7 years ago


Twwtoolong- the blood tests were not so bad, just the cramp at the time of hsg. I did have some blood right after it, but only had to wear a pad that day. It will all be worth it! Let me know if there is anything else you would like to know! Good luck!

7 years ago


luckykap thank you for sharing all of that! I am looking into that soon and didn't know anything about it, so someone with experience with it really helps.

I'm 4dpo today and just kind of bleh. I've seen a lot of posts on these boards the last couple of days of people on cycles 2/3/1 etc all getting BFP's and its just so looming. I've been off for a couple of days about it. I'm happy for everyone getting a BFP, but its kind of a sad feeling for us like "why hasn't it happened yet?" you know? What if the low sperm isn't the only issue we're dealing with, how much longer will it be?

Ignore me, I'm just in one of my moods. haha


7 years ago • Post starter


Baby bump- I feel the same way! I'm so happy for everyone and it gives me hope, I'm just wondering when my turn is up lol after 8 IUIs now on my second IVF cycle I know it's coming soon!!!it will happen just have to keep the faith and not give up hope...it's so hard though, I know!

7 years ago


Happy Friday everyone!

Tww - I really hope that you'll be able to at least get some answers with this investigative month. That's awesome that it's all covered under your insurance. Good luck. It sounds as though this month is going to be rough, but worth it!

Babybump - I'm totally in the same boat. I'm super happy for everyone, but at the same time, I'm over going to baby showers. Shopping for all this cute baby stuff, when it's not going to be for my baby. Every time I go out shopping for stuff for a baby, I want to buy stuff for MY baby, then remember I don't have one. lol it sucks.

Right now, we're NTNP. If it happens, it happens. If not, well, we'll worry about that in a couple cycles. I can't keep stressing myself and my poor boyfriend out. It's obvious that he feels like he's walking on egg shells around me, not knowing if I'm going to be angry or sad that day, so I thought I'd give us both some time to cool down.

to everyone!

7 years ago


Jenna same thing with DH! There have been times when AF has come and i've bawled my eyes out, or times when I've just continued on with life. He never understands its just a matter of when I've accepted it. Then I see announcements and I'm either happy or mad depending on who the person is haha

We initially said only try 3 cycles then give up...10 cycles in it's become almost like an obsession. I think in cycles (AF, fertile week, tww, AF, fertile week, tww, etc) and its like normal months/dates have disappeared. Its hard to get out of that mindset!


7 years ago • Post starter



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