Feeling discouraged, please share hope/support?
Five months ago, my sweet man and I made the decision that I would stop taking birth control so that we could begin TTC. We've been trying since then. I was sure this cycle would be the one. We tried a lot during my projected fertile window, I was experiencing nausea and nipple changes and AF was 4 days late so I was super hopeful despite multiple BFN. Yesterday AF showed up. I'm heartbroken. I know they say to consult a doctor if you can't conceive after a year of trying, but I also read couples on average conceive by month 6 of trying. That's right around the corner. I'm 27 and he is 30. I had a laparoscopy on Feb. 26 to remove some ovarian cysts and a pelvic ligament adhesion. My OBGYN found no other obvious issues that would cause infertility - she did a dye test to ensure my tubes were open and the dye did come out but she said it was a bit slow. My SO has no known issues that would cause me to not conceive. People say stress has a lot to do with it but I don't feel stress or pressure about actually trying itself - it's still fun and doesn't feel like a chore and we mostly just let it happen when the mood strikes. I do have a lot of stress and anxiety in other areas of my life - I'm diagnosed with general anxiety and work with a therapist and psychiatrist to manage it. I try to eat healthy but could do a bit better. My BMI is in the normal range. I try to do cardio and yoga but sometimes it's challenging because I also deal with fibromyalgia. Does anyone have any advice/reassurance/hope/comfort to share? I know it just takes people a while, but I can't help feeling discouraged and worrying that I'm the "problem."
6 Replies • 4 months ago • Edited
@Mamafriend, I had been on birth control for more than 10 years, so I can't really say I remember what my cycles were like before that. I started birth control when I was 15 because I went on Accutane to help my severe acne and birth control was required with it for women. I just stayed on it afterward. I feel like when we're teens our cycles are still developing and more likely to be irregular so even if I did remember I'm not sure it would mean much. I do remember getting pretty bad cramps both on and off birth control. But I asked my OBGYN if she thought I had PCOS and she said no because of how regular my cycles have been in the 5 months I've been off birth control.
4 months ago • Post starter
My hub's and I had been TTC since june 2014 only to go through 3 MCs, disappointments after another and being diagnosedwith "unexplained fertility". After I quit my stressful job and started a different, less stressful new job, same position, to my surprise on 3/16/2020, I tested and we're pregnant. I couldn't believe it. I'm currently 9 wks today and going in for my 1st prenatal check tomorrow. I've never made it this far with the other pregnancies, so I have hopes.
Best of luck and wishing you lots of baby dust.
4 months ago
I suppose stress could be a big part of it - I'm trying my best to manage it but getting my career anywhere near where I want it to be has been a constant battle since the moment I graduated. Hopefully that will be on its way to getting better soon - I'm going to finish a second career-changing degree this August. I'm also making an effort to reorganize my priorities so I don't spend so much time working hard on my career path. Maybe this will help. Best of luck to you as well.
4 months ago • Post starter
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