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35 and ttc....

Anyone around my age and having a hard time ttc? My youngest is 3.5, and I'm kicking myself for waiting. I always thought I'd start trying at 34 and have my last by 35. And I really want a last one.

Anywho, 34 came and went. This is the 9th serious ttc cycle. I will start in about 3 days and it's not looking good for a bfp.

I have been tracking with opks over a year. I never get a super dark peak but I get one that's close to the control line and feel o cramps the very next day.

I have a dr appt jan 30. I really don't think everything is still properly working. I feel like my window has shut and I'm really struggling. Everyone around me is getting pregnant at 30 and 31, and expressing how glad they are they didn't put it off.

I have already been blessed with 3 so I don't feel I have the right to be sad. But I want one more baby and it hurts.


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17 Replies • 4 years ago


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Who says you don’t have the right? You absolutely do! There are no set of rules stating if you’ve been blessed one, 10 times, or however many that you can’t feel sad for wanting more. Have you gotten in touch with your doc? I’d give them a call and go from there.

4 years ago


I feel this deep in my soul. I do not share my TTC struggles with ANYONE because people are so critical. Why do you want more kids? Why are you upset you can’t have more? Be content and happy with what you have. It makes me so sad and angry. It’s not that I’m not content, but my heart knows I want more and I can’t just squash that feeling. It’s hard.

4 years ago


Angela, yes, my appointment is Jan 30.
A lot of people suggest that I should be grateful for what I have. I know so many women would love 1, and my heart breaks for them, but mine also breaks every month I'm out.

I'm not sure if it's my age or just that I always imagined one more, but this has been stressful.

Thanks for encouragement. Feeling a bit lonely as I've "wore out my friends". The 2 people closest to me are 8 and 9 months pregnant (one is my sister in law and we started ttc the same month). They want to understand but they don't.


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4 years ago • Post starter


I will be 34 at the end of next week. I’m on cycle 5 of trying to conceive #3. It is very heartbreaking every cycle when my period starts. I have irregular cycles and struggle with my husbands lower sex drive. Timing things just right can be pretty hard for us. You have every right to feel sad. If you don’t feel like your family is complete- every period feels like a loss- every month is an eternity, and everyone else’s pregnancy can feel like salt in a wound. Last year my husband told me he didn’t want more- I went into a horrible depression and felt like my whole world fell apart. I went to counseling and worked through it- in the end- my husband decided he wanted another and was just nervous about finances and having enough love to share with all of them. Long story short- I can very much relate to feeling concerned about age and fertility and the need to add to my family!


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4 years ago


Kahlan+Nat, I'm so glad your husband had a change of heart. Yes, timing is so stressful. We just aren't the young romantic couple we used to be, especially with his long hours and kids in the house. I think my least favorite activity is tracking my cycle.

I can't wait to see you get your bfp soon.


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4 years ago • Post starter


You are blessed and should be grateful which you are, but people without any can't tell you or make you feel guilty for your grievances while ttc more. We all have our paths and heartaches, you are entitled to feel how you do. Keep your chin up and and don't let others beat you down while they are on their journey. Keep us posted on your appointment!

4 years ago


I am 33 this year and my little boy is 3 also...this is the 19th month if ttc with last month seeing the first bfp ending in a cp...my partner is 42 and with every month that goes by the more depressing it gets...currently on 10dpo and I can’t even second guess symptoms any more because it’s different every month...just got to hold out 3 more day’s till af is due and am keeping my finger and toes and anything else I can cross, crossed xxx

4 years ago


I am 35. I didnt get married till 28. We started trying shortly after. Didn't get pregnant till 32. Took us 4 years. Now we have been trying 2 years for #2. I too mourn the thought my daughter could be an only child. She loves her cousins so much. While Im thankful I have her, i am also sad because i never intended to just have 1. We will.see what happens. I am still trying and hoping for a miracle.


Mill

4 years ago


I'm 35 had my son at 30 after TTC for two years and one round of clomid. My marriage broke down shortly after. I now have a new partner and we have been TTC for two years and 4 months. Been told I can't have clomid this time so just keeping our fingers crossed. My ex husband has since had another baby with his new partner and it hurts so much!

4 years ago


Why can't you habe Clomid? I think I'd find a new Dr. I already done 3 rounds this time again with no luck.


Mill

4 years ago


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