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Fear, the ultimate thief of joy.

Just a quick update from me, I'm 5w1d today, but fear has taken over. My Clearblue weeks estimator is still reading 2-3 (goes by weeks part ovulation not LMP), my frers are darker than control but aren't getting any darker ,My symptoms seem to be fading and my hospital refused to take any betas until after my scan next Friday. I am consumed by fear.

I'm not sure how I'd get through another loss. I feel completely paralysed by this overwhelming amount of fear.

Em x


TTC#1 MC <img src=

10 Comments • 6 years ago


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Hey, dun let fear take u over to the dark side. I know its easier said than done but BREATHE... Relax or distract yourself... You're pregnant, dear! Il keep my prayers for you and your lil bean ok... Wishing you a H&H 9 mths ahead...

6 years ago


It's completely terrifying. I'd love to tell you it gets easier as the pregnancy progresses but it hasn't for me. Every little pain and twinge has me panicked and I check for signs of bleeding every time I use the bathroom, I'm 25 weeks.
What I can tell you is that the stressing has removed the joy and excitement from this pregnancy and I really wish I'd been able to deal with it differently..maybe a counsellor or someone you could discuss your fears with might help? I'm not sure I'm being helpful but miracles can happen, try and hold on to that. I wish you the best of luck, I hope this little one sticks with you.

6 years ago


I am not sure that the fear completely goes away after you experience a loss...

I find this verse comforting in times when the fear consumes me...it makes me feel less alone in the pain...

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. - Isaiah 41:10

I am praying this bean sticks my friend and praying for your peace of mine, heart and soul during it all.


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6 years ago


mind*


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6 years ago


I'd push it. I would tell them not even 2 months ago yiu experienced an ectopic and betas need to be drawn asap. Threaten them with a law suit or something. Can you go to the Er?


Mill

6 years ago


I totally know how that goes. When I got pregnant right after my miscarriage all I did was worry. Try to not to worry too much (I know easier said than done!) Also, why won't your hospital do betas? That just doesn't seem right to me. My doc doesn't automatically do them, but if I request - she'll do them. I'd push it - especially since you just experienced a loss. Good luck!

6 years ago


Thinking of you. I dont think the fear will ever go away. It's a horrible feeling. I can't believe you can't get the betas done. What about a general practice doctor or something. I am hoping for the best for you. Also, they say stress is the worst thing you can do on your body so just try to relax and enjoy it and tell yourself everyday " today I am pregnant". Not sure it will comfort you, but there isn't much you can do at this point to change the outcome so enjoy that you are pregnant and able to get pregnant and think positive thoughts. I will continue praying for you and a sticky healthy bean.

6 years ago


It is natural to be afraid when you have gone through loss. Try to surround yourself with people and situations that are uplifting. If you can, avoid too much self-help. It only causes anxiety and stress. My prayers are for your peace and confirmation of a healthy pregnancy. Hugs

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. ~Isaiah 41:10

6 years ago


Don't let fear take away your joy and keep you from experiencing this wonderful time. I know it is hard not to worry, but try to remain calm. Pamper yourself, take it easy and spend time with loved ones. I hope everything goes well with your doctor's visit and that you find a way to decompress.

6 years ago


Hi. I totally understand how you feel, but you have to stay positive! I had 2 cp back to back, so when I got bfp third time, o god, I was worried about everything! My symptoms disappeared after 5w, I didnt feel pregnant, kept testing and thinking lines not dark enough, but it was perfect healthy pregnancy and now I have happy healthy one year old! Once frer is darker than control line, it wont get any much darker and its hard to c any difference! Just try to keep calm and once you see your baby at first scan you will feel much better! But I totally understand your worry! Few days I got bfp, and so worried about progress, cos its so early yet, but I feel much more relaxed this time around. Im wishing you a happy healthy 9 months, Congratulations :)

6 years ago


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