Community post

Hi Liz ! Nipple pain is such a weird thing for me now its been about 4 cycles its ALWAYS sore all month long lol.. except for the first 2 days of AF. hahaha. Im so excited for you, how are you feeling besides that ? :)

Congrats on your BFP Tara! I just wanted to pop in and say hi. Baby dust to all!

Sugaar- I'm feeling much better. Had a bout of morning sickness and vomiting on Saturday but I'm good now. Out of the 22 lbs I've lost total I've gained back 3 lbs but the doc said it wasn't a bad thing since I was overweight to begin with. Everything else is going well, my child is pretty active so that's a great thing.

That's good :) ! Take it easy hun xo

Hi Ladies....
Umm, I've been dreading typing this all day but you are my sisters in ttc and I wanted you to know.
My strange spotting that lasted since implantation finally stopped on saturday morning. I was relieved. That evening I started having some light cramping but I read it was completely normal. Then yesterday, after church, we went to my parents' house for the day. Everything was fine til I went to the bathroom and found a small little clot when I wiped. I knew right then, that it was over. I forced myself to get through the day before falling apart. When we got home, I burst out in tears. Dh held me and told me til the bleeding starts that there was still hope. He's so sweet and hopeful. Before bed I started cramping. Not horrible but it got worse. I knew by morning that I wouldnt have my baby anymore, so I sang a little song to my baby and went to sleep, praying for a miracle. I woke up at 6am in a lot of pain. My cramps were extremely painful and my back was hurting whenever the cramps hit. It was like I could imagine contractions being like. I was scared. I didnt wake dh so I just grabbed hold of the bed sheets and tried to breathe threw it til I couldnt take it anymore. I got up and went to the bathroom. I pulled down my underwear but there was nothing on the pad, I was shocked. So I grabbed a cup to pee in for a test to check the line darkness. But as soon as I started to go....there was so much blood. As soon as the largest amount of stuff passed, the cramps subsided some and I could breathe again. I kept singing in my head the song I had just sang at church, "Every high thing must come down, every stronghold shall be broken, you wear the victor's crown, you overcome, you overcome".
I dipped my frer into the "urine" and it came back almost negative. I knew it would be. I got cleaned up and when I wiped, a piece of tissue fell out with tiny blood vessels. I just stared at it knowing what it was apart of and that my little embryo was probably in that. I stumbled out of the bathroom covered in sweat and weak. Dh was standing there and I handed him the test. All I could say was, "I miscarried..." I started to walk back to the bedroom and he could see how weak I was. He helped me back to bed and tucked me in. He curled up with me and held me while I cried. Poor guy was late for work cause he wouldnt leave me. After he left, I just laid in bed for a few hours crying and staring at the ceiling. I finally pulled myself out of bed and onto the couch where I've been all day. It's been rough but I'm hanging in there. DH did our grocery shopping and he took care of dinner. I'm just so tired. I feel like I let you all down. I've been trying to focus on the fact that my baby will have 5 siblings in heaven and wont have to feel the pain of this world. I just feel like it was a girl...I named her faith cause at 4 weeks she was the size of a mustard seed "faith the size of a mustard seed". But i wont have to worry about her ever getting hurt or having her heart broken. And I'll meet them all one day. It just hurts right now. I'm still cramping painfully off and on but the bleeding has slowed...I think cause I lost so much this morning. Please keep me and my dh in your prayers, our hearts and spirits are taking a beating right now. I love you guys.

Aww Tara, honey I'm so sorry! I don't even really know what to say. I wish I could just be there for you and give a big ol hug. I will definitely keep you in my prayers. Your dh is so wonderful helping you through the situation. You could never do anything to let us down, don't ever think that! I feel so bad talking about my pregnancy now, I don't want you to be upset. I hope soon maybe we could meet, you are in St. Louis aren't you? I love you guys too!

Tara, i am so sorry.... there are no words that will take away your pain but just imagine i am Holding your Hand... you didn't let anyone down, you are a beautiful strong woman and you deserve all the best in the world! Big hug from me!

Oh Tara, there are no words.. Sending you lots and lots of prayers. Big hugs from afar dear. I wish I could sit on your couch with you for hours and just be there for you. Tell DH I said thank you for being such an awesome hubby to you! He does seem really amazing :-) You did NOT let us down, don't you ever think that! Understand? lol ;-) NOT EVER! You are like a Sister to us, if it weren't for you we wouldn't even have this amazing circle of friends. I wouldn't know what to do without you guys. We would never ever think anything other than positive, happy, and respectful feelings for each other. I admire your strength and faith.
Love you honey! Get some rest, drink lots of fluid and please check in when you start feeling better.

You cannot do anything to ever let us down Tara, you are the reason we are here and we are all here for you! I wish we were closer, we'd all be right there sitting on your couch with you holding your hand and praying our way through this. We are in this together, the good the bad, together through it all. I love her name, it suits perfectly.. and you will be seeing her again, all of your precious angel babies are rejoicing in Heaven and imagining the day they get to meet their mommy who loves them more than this world and has done everything in her power to see them. I love you Tara!! We are here for you. Big hugs from me!!

Tara I'm crying so much right now I could feel your pain. Like eveyone else said, I wish we could be there with you -physically- right now hunny ... We all love you so much . Please know that its not your fault and you let absolutely no one down. I know you're hurting sweetie :( I know.. <3 <3 <3 <3 *hugs*