Community post

I've been trying now since early last year and have had 3 chemical pregnancies. Only a couple of people know this as i'm quite a privet person. I work with pre-schoolers so know a fair bit about children and yet I too get people telling me that I need to hurry up or i'll find it too hard (umm, already am and i'm only 31). Then I get the whole you can't know whats it's like to have children i have no time for anything. Again i'm not stupid I know how much time children need and i'm sorry but these people just come across as ungrateful. Then I get comments like when you have children you will find, or you will realise. Then I get the comments from collegues about how when we finish work for the day they have to go and sort out the children but how lucky i am because i can go home and do nothing. I'm sorry but just because i don't yet have children it doesn't mean i have no life and by the way I want to go home and sort out my children i just can't, urrrrr. And then there are my friends who are new parents and who insist on telling me about how you need to do this with a child or handle them this way or how you need to get them into routine etc. HELLO i work with children i have studyed development o and as i'm trying for a baby I 've researched all this (o and these are the friends who know we are trying). I could just scream and I too have felt the urge to slap but we just need to breath and stick together. Maybe the memory of how hard it can be to concieve disapears for these people during labour along with the memories of the painfulness of labour. Sorry rant over and baby dust to all.

Cabeana,

Thank you so much for this post, and thank you to everyone who has commented. It's good to see other women reading this post, and relating so strongly that more stories are left.

TTC is supposed to be a happy and exciting time in our lives, but we know first hand just how difficult and depressing it can really be, especially when you feel like there couldn't possibly be anybody else out there feeling the exact same way as you.

I've been able to relate to every single post you ladies have kindly shared, and had a little giggle at how people think they are giving out the world's most best kept TTC secret! Have lots of sex! They just don't realise how stupid they sound!

Thank you all once again, I don't feel quite so crazy and alone now, and to anybody else reading this, please leave a post if you can relate, help some more ladies realise they are not alone.

Babydust
xxxxxxxxx

This is the only place I don't feel completely alone!
My hubby doesn't even really get it, I get so upset when I get my period and literally get depressed like I failed...
EVERYONE knows we are trying and I am constantly being asked, everyone around me is too...planned and unplanned everywhere...feels like everyone but me!
Even my grandmother said " do you think maybe something is wrong that it is taking this long?"
We have been trying since June 2011, BUT we really got the swing of things in about October....
My hubby is not in a rush now because we just settled on a house, he doesn't seem to get that I don't really want the house if we can't fill it!!!
I am officially starting to tell people we are putting the trying on hold until the end of the summer when we are settled in the house...I don't mean to lie but it is just easier...
we are both going to the dr within the next few weeks! I just want to know if I there is something up so I can try and get on with my life!
I don't know how to "NOT TRY AND LET IT HAPPEN"

I think what it means to jus let it happenis to focus more on your relationship, or the moments when making love. Kinda jus lose yourself. Taking it slow usually does it for me. I jus have my bf give me alot of affection, keep us busy with movies, walks, parks, etc. Or jus making out lol

But i do get envious seeing EVERYONE pregnant. Its like im the only non pregnant person in the world sometimes.lol does suck. Especially when ya have promising symptoms jus to have a period.

"Youre still young" "It will happen when it is suppose to happen" "God has a time for all things" blah blah. Yeah, easy for people to say when YOU DONT HAVE PCOS! I feel like my body hates me. I know we just started ttcing this Feb, but it hurts when you know it may never happen and each month that goes by and no baby-its like my pcos is mocking me. I literally cried because I feel like I have failed in some way. I wish people would just shut their mouths and keep the comments to themselves. I know they mean well, but it only makes it worse.

*sorry about the rant* *baby dust to everyone*

So glad to see someone else post what I'm thinking! That saying along with "if you just relax, stop thinking about it... it will happen" makes my blood boil! I am relaxed, sorry if i have to do more than just think pregnant to fall pregnant LOL!
We've been trying for 10 months and i know what you mean about Dec not being long but it certainly feels like years over months.

Baby dust to you tho! xox