Community post

Hi lili0825 I'm 4 days past my 2nd IUI. We've been ttc for 2 years, and have been diagnosed as "unexplained". DH and I are both 32. I'm not hopeful at all that this IUI will work- I've known a few couples to do IUI's and it has worked for some, I just don't have any optimism left. Our doc recommended that we do 3 IUI's and if they don't work we'll move on to IVF. The earliest we can start those would be February. This entire process is very frustrating and like you said it certainly feels like torture. I don't know why I get my hopes up at all at the beginning of a cycle. Sucker for punishment I guess. I only have one friend who has gone through this- she now has a healthy IVF baby. I think that's why I just want to do that instead of going through IUI #3. People who have never had to deal with infertility just don't understand how stressful it is. I don't know about you but it consumes my life.

Hi Browni55, Thanks for your reply. I completely hear you. I try to remember what life was like before we started TTC. It has taken over aspects of my life. I wish I could share with people what I'm going through, it really doesn't make sense to me that there is a stigma surrounding infertility. I have shared with close friends & family, but they have no idea what it's really like. They think they're helping when they say, "just relax!", "it'll happen!" What do you do for support?

I got a negative test result today. So IUI #4 is definitely, officially a failed attempt. I'm just waiting for the call from the IVF clinic to start booking my appointments -- looks like I'd be doing it right around Jan or Feb, too.

One thing I'm wondering is why in online communities or even in the paper work handed out by my clinic do they make IVF sound like it will be the most emotionally taxing, worst thing you'll ever go through. At this point I feel like, whatever, I realize its much more invasive as far as meds and procedures, but once you've started down the infertility path, it seems like just another step. I think to myself, I'm sure it'll be super taxing and emotional, and sure I'll have to go to the clinic A LOT -- I'm a bit scared about side effects of drugs, but my husband had a very serious diagnosis and complex surgery two years ago that had me questioning whether he would live or not and I think, nothing can be as bad as that. This was in our first year of marriage. So, my hope is that if we got through that and then a year later me having several ER visits from endo and burst cysts, followed by my lap surgery, we can get through IVF!

I wish you the best on your journey. I often feel alone in this. Thanks for sharing your experience - know you're not alone!