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mom2bx3

feeling guilty

Hello ladies. We've been ttc #3 for about 9 months. I have a friend who has been trying for 5 years for #1. She just gave up after three unsucessful IVF. Although they have now moved to adoption as an option, I still am feeling really guilty about wanting #3, when she can't have one.
Then my brother and his wife just announced they are due in march 2015 with #1. My family is majorly petty and if I get pregnant with #3 it will take away her "spotlight"...even if its a few months off of hers.
So, I am considering just calling off our quest and enjoying the two wonderful children we have, but I look around at my family and I just know that someone is missing. I want another so badly, and so does DH, but I want it to be a happy time, not one that is surrounded by guilt. Ugh! What would you do?

1 Reply • 9 years ago

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dakotagurrl

I would continue ttc. Altho very unfortunate, its not ur fault that ur friend is having ttc issues, and u also shouldnt feel the need to worry about stealing someone elses thunder. U need to do what is best for u and ur husband, not everyone else. I learned a long time ago that I cant make everyone happy, so I do the best I can not to upset anyone, but ultimately I will make sure my husband and kids are happy before I worry about anyone else or their pettiness.

How much regret or resentment will u hold if u miss ur baby makin' window and settle? Another thing to ask urself, would anyone not have a baby to spare ur feelings? I doubt it! I say make a bebe!! =))