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Very crappy first IUD Apppointment...not happy [sad] [sad]

Hey ladies
OK so 6months after an appointment with an OBGYN who explained I have an enlarged uterus, and should get on with conception before the uterine fibroids makes it impossible *1big one and several little ones*, I was finally able to persuade DH that we should try IUI. Imagine my elation when out of the blue he suggested I make an appointment and he'd be happy to come with me. Well that's precisely what happened. Our appointment was made with a reputable established institution, in fact our appointment was with one of the co-founders, so I was assured I was in good hands. I had dropped all my medical records off few days earlier to prevent my explaining all I've had done in the past. Plus I did some research on IUIs, was loaded with over a page of questions, and was confident we would walk out of there even more informed to be able to make a decision there and then. WRONG!!!
Our appointment started well, with the specialist asking us how we met, yadda yadda yadda. However laughter aside he explained he had read my records and seen I've had fibroids, had removed them with a myomectomy, seen they had grown back and that I've had a Laparoscopy and a Hysteroscopy again to help me cope with the fibroids. It took a wrong turn when he continued talking about the fibroids, and how another myomectomy would be the best solutions to help me deal with them. I explained there are not bothering me, only during my menstrual as that's when I cramp and my flow is heavier than normal. He said because I've had it for so long, as do most women we adapt and create coping mechanisms to help us deal with it, yet he knows how painful and horrible it is for us or rather me, and that I need not suffer anymore with it. He had already had diagrams laid out before us showing fibroids and where they are in the cavity wall and went on to tell us how they cause pain during intercourse, very weak bladder and constipation along with other things. I sat there wondering why is this man telling me about the fibroids I've lived with without asking me how I've coped rather than assumed they are making my life a living nightmare! Why is he assuming I'm incapable of functioning as a result of a situation I've had for 15yrs ago, and like my record said they were removed and stayed away for 5yrs, only after that they grew back, but not at full speed!! Gradually! So it's not like I can't leave my house, or can't function as a result!
Anyway realizing we were already 30mins into our 45mins $250 consultation with him I asked about the IUI since as that was the reason for our visit, well he quickly shut that down and said having fibroids to the size of mines *apples/ oranges* will cause miscarriage and that is something he wouldn't want me to experience as it's a painful experience. I said I agree, but that having a myomectomy was off the table for me. As after being sedated for a 3rd procedure regarding my fibroids I made my mine up I would not do anything else to remove them unless it was time to take my womb out. But it was scary that I kept going in and out for major and minor surgeries yet the fibroids were still there. Furthermore I said being from England where we have world class healthcare is free *well we pay through our taxes*, I was advised prior to surgery *10yrs ago* that I shouldn't have no more than 3 c-sections. Due to the wear and tear on the area that is being cut and stitched back but most importantly they were concerned about scar tissues and the problem that can caused down the road if I keep having myomectomy/c-sections. He said yes agree with all they said but that he had a patient who had 6 MYEMECTOMY!!!! My draw fell open! Like are you serious?? He's like oh yes! So the one you had is nothing, you can keep doing it as much as you need to. Just like his patient, because her fibroids kept returning and she wasn't finished having children. Eventually when she was finished having her babies she had a hysterectomy and have her womb removed! I was petrified that a Dr of his esteem would be encouraging me to have several myomectomy's when the fibroids I had are not life threatening, are not disrupting my life, neither do they prevent conception! Oh less I forget that despite my recording showing that I've had a Hysteroscopy done stating explicitly that both tubes are clear, open and simply not blocked, he suggested I have another one done *HSG* because my fibroids are probably pressing against the tube and preventing pregnancy. *Both tube???* Shortly after he suggested we did an ultrasound which I did, only I regretted it because again, he kept patronizing me about how difficult like must be for me living with them and how difficult life must be for me. Again I said only during my menstrual do I have an problem otherwise they are fine to live with. I mean he just kept going on, and on, and on and on, trying to drive fear in my and DH that I should have another myomectomy to have them removed before even considering the IUI. Eventually he was done, and went back into his office; I had my blood work done too to a tune of $600 (hopeful our insurance will cover it). We were done, and walked out somber and not saying a word.
Did I explain that I never even get to ask one of the countless questions I had researched and had printed on a sheet of paper? Or did I even mention that only do I cope the fibroids I have, but I've NEVER felt paint during intercourse, been constipated or have a weak bladder as a result of these said fibroids? Well you know what I was never asked by this specialist. He never wanted to know how much times per week dh and I did the deed, are we timing intercourse correctly or what we could be doing wrong that haven't brought conception as of yet. No. Why should he when he could shake our money tree and pick up the gold coins falling off. Instead he went straight for the money maker. A Myomectomy, HSG, then the IUI. In excess of $10,000 at the minimum!


User Image User Image Praying for a fruitful 2012, with tonnes of for us ALL!!!

1 Reply • 10 years ago


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The myomectomy which would include lots of procedures and blood work and ultimately cost and arm and a leg. An HSG costing another arm at $1100 then he and only then he would suggest an IUI which would cost another part of our limb, leaving us penniless and broke when all we wanted to do was ONE thing. My dh will be going back to have his semen tested/analyzed. Besides that I'm unsure now where do we go and what we should do.
I could be wrong, but I honestly believe the specialist just wanted to increase his revenue. He showed no great concern for us wanting to become pregnant, instead he just sell, sell, sell, and sent us away empty handed. Making around $1000 for that consultation and blood work done. Am I going nuts? Does anyone else agree? Any suggestions in what to do now? I could really do with some honest opinions right now.

PS - we do have insurance coverage, however it provides little to no coverage for fertility treatment. I planned major surgery of any kind would be cheaper on our pockets for me to go back to England and have it done....for free!

Thanks all!

Stephanie


User Image User Image Praying for a fruitful 2012, with tonnes of for us ALL!!!

10 years ago • Post starter


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