Community post

New here, just wanted to introduce myself..

My name is Satu, I'm 29 years old, mother to three, ttc number 4. My husband and I have been together 11+ years, married for nearly four and a half, ttc for 4, actively for three, about to start trying aggressively beginning tomorrow.

I know some people may feel it is selfish to want a fourth when we already have three amazing children, two boys ages 9 and 6, and our daughter, 8, but I have always desired a large family. Also, we started off young with us getting pregnant at 18, and now that we're married, stable and more mature, we want to do this right but it hasn't been as easy as before.

From getting pregnant fairly easy at weights between 156 (our first) to 184 with our youngest, I have ballooned in weight which has greatly affected my fertility, but not my yearning for another child, especially a since our daughter has been wanting a sister and has been quite vocal as of late (she loves babies, younger children and watching birth videos).

I admit I've been pretty poor at getting healthy and really committing to this in the past few years but I honestly didn't believe my weight was so out of control that, four years after the vows, I'd still be talking about ttc number for instead of actually raising her and another child or two, so here I am.
4yrs later, 284lbs, doiing what I said I wouldn't. On a internet board, charting cycles, temps, and taking extreme measures to lose weight and get healthy in hopes of a successful conception and healthy fullterm child.

I'm just here for support in this isolating preconception purgatory, hoping to connect with other women since I'm not devoid of children, but still feel the pain of desiring another and failing to produce one.

1 Reply • 8 years ago

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