The last time I was in here, I just found out I was pregnant and I was basking in the glow of the life that was blooming inside of me.  Now, its just a painful reminder.  I turned the corner with my friend and spotted a woman who had to be well into her second trimester.  She was just starting to show and had her hand placed ever so gently on her emerging bump.  I felt the jealousy starting to well within me, a feeling that was unfortunately all-too familiar.  “That should be me” I thought painfully  “I’d be into my second trimester by now”.

Then I spotted it.  The fragile dark red thread on her right wrist.  Suddenly my jealousy subsided and was quickly replaced by excitement and happiness for this woman I have never met.  I wanted to run up to her and hug her.  At the risk of scaring her and my friend, I managed to hold back my excitement and to utter a sincere and excited “Congratulations!”  as I passed her.  As we walked by, I waved to her and I caught the glimpse of understanding in her eyes when she saw the dark red thread gracing my wrist.

I spent the rest of my trip thinking about that stranger and feeling hopeful that my time would come again and someday I’d be the woman in the aisle, receiving the congratulatory wave from the stranger.  My day will come.

So how is it that one lonely piece of dark red thread could change the entire attitude of my day?  I realized that the woman that I met in that aisle had literally been in my shoes.  She was wearing the common thread.   Going on three years go, the internet community of women struggling with infertility discussed the need for a secret handshake of sorts.  Some sort of a secret symbol to others to let them know that they weren’t alone.  For pregnant woman to let that woman next to her know that she had been there.

I am in the process of making myself a new Common Thread bracelet for a few reasons.  One, I’ve worn the first one to pieces.  I was constantly making sure it was still on my wrist!  The second is that I want to add something to memorialize MacKenna (the baby we lost last year).    Some people have brought up the possibility of the common thread bracelet being confused with a certain religious bracelet, which is why the world is full of possibilities for making your own unique bracelet.  I am going to excerpt the meaning behind the pomegranate thread from another blog, which I encourage you all to take the time to read the full post on.

From Stirrup Queens:

Royalyne stepped forward and got the ball rolling with a write up that we tweaked until it became this statement:

Pomegranates, a longstanding symbol of fertility, serve as a strong analogy to those suffering through infertility. Though each pomegranate skin is unique in colour and texture, the seeds inside are remarkably similar from fruit to fruit. Though our diagnosis is unique—endometriosis, low sperm count, luteal phase defect, or causes unknown—the emotions, those seeds on the inside, are the same from person to person. Infertility creates frustration, anger, depression, guilt, and loneliness. Compounding these emotions is the shame that drives people suffering from infertility to retreat into silence.

In addition, the seeds represent the multitude of ways one can build their family: natural conception, treatments, adoption, third-party reproduction, or even choosing to live child-free.

The pomegranate thread holds a two-fold purpose: to identify and create community between those experiencing infertility as well as create a starting point for a conversation. Women pregnant through A.R.T., families created through adoption, or couples trying to conceive during infertility can wear the thread, identifying themselves to others in this silent community. At the same time, the string serves as a gateway to conversations about infertility when people inquire about its purpose. These conversations are imperative if we are ever to remove the social stigma attached to infertility.Tie on the thread because you’re not alone. Wear to make aware.

Join us in starting this conversation about infertility by purchasing this pomegranate-coloured thread (#814 by DMC) at any craft, knitting, or variety store such as Walmart or Target. Tie it on your right wrist. Notice it on others.

The Common Thread Project: Wear to Make Aware

I think it’s probably assumed, but since I haven’t actually stated it, I am not a doctor. Your fertility journey is best directed by your doctor/midwife/ob-gyn and your unique personal conditions. Any posts I make regarding possible aids/tests/supplements are to be taken as a point in which to start your own research and to spark the conversation with your medical specialist….

Welcome to part two of the joys (and frustrations) of monitoring your fertility:

We’ve already covered the cheap and free ways of checking on the progress of your day to day fertility, now we’re starting to get a little more expensive.

Ovulation Predictor Kits (OPK’s): OPK’s work by detecting the Luteinizing Hormone (LH) surge in your urine. The LH is the body’s chemical that signals to the ovary that it’s time to release the egg. While it’s important to follow each specific brand’s unique instructions, the general procedure is to test urine at least once daily. The majority of OPK’s require that you do not test with first morning urine (FMU) as LH isn’t produced until later in the day.

Unlike with a Home Pregnancy Test (HPT), the theory that a line is a positive is not true for OPKs. The key to reading an opk is to look for a test line that is as dark (or darker) than the control line. Google is helpful for finding many pictures of positive and negative tests, should you question the results of your specific test. Some women choose to test more than once a day as they approach apparently ovulation as it is possible to miss the LH surge and never receive a positive OPK, despite ovulating.

OPK’s come in a variety of styles and price levels, from a dollar or less a piece for a standard non-digital or more for a digital variety and can be purchased online or in most retail stores.

Pros:

• Can help “predict” and/or confirm ovulation.

Cons:

• Can get pricey for some people, depending on the length of their cycle.
• It’s possible to miss the surge and if you are only using OPK’s may not have an accurate idea of when and or if you are ovulating.
• Some people find limiting liquids and holding urine every day for an OPK to be time consuming/difficult.

Ferning Microscope: The ferning microscope uses your saliva to detects hormonal changes approaching ovulation. As part of a normal cycle, estrogen increases and as it increases it creates a distinct pattern that are visible with the aid of a microscope. The ferning microscopes available for the ttc crowd are usually small and portable.

You should follow the directions with the specific microscope you purchase, but as a general rule of thumb, they recommend that you test in the morning, before doing any of the following activities: eating, drinking or brushing your teeth (as these can all interfere with the results). You collect a small amount of saliva and put it on the slide and view it through the microscope. There are three different statuses of your saliva. Non-fertile, transitional, and fertile (full ferning).

I have only really ever seen these available on-line (through various merchants) but they might be available in retail stores.

Pros:

• One-time cost, reusable (for up to two years, possibly longer)
• Portable
• You can use it anywhere and it is less messy (as opposed to a urine-base test).
• You can see potential ovulation approaching, allowing you to take advantage of potentially fertile days.

Cons:

• More cost initially than some other methods
• May have to replace if you are having ttc
• Doesn’t (on it’s own) confirm ovulation
• Some women may have many periods of ferning without ovulation
• Can be affected by various medications (Clomid, for instance)
• May be difficult for people with vision problems to use

Clearblue Easy Fertility Monitor (CBEFM): CBEFM’s are basically mini-computers that read a more complex OPK to distinguish approaching fertility. They differ from regular OPK’s in the fact that they don’t just detect surging LH, they also detect the rising estrogen. In that sense, a cbefm is kind of a love child between OPK’s and the ferning microscope. :-) It learns your unique cycles and will adjust accordingly. As a result, it may take a cycle or two to see the full advantage of the cbefm.

The computer unit will ask for a test stick if it feels that you could be approaching ovulation. Unlike OPK’s, you use FMU for the cbefm. You insert the stick into the reader and it’ll give you one of three fertility ratings. Low (infertile), High (possibly fertile) or peak (the most fertile). The first cycle you use the monitor, it will jump almost immediately to a high reading as soon as it starts asking for test sticks. As you develop a deeper relationship with your monitor, the # of high readings will potentially decrease. Some women have reported only one day of high reading before a peak. Once you have a peak reading, you will ovulate anywhere with in the next 48 hours. After your first peak reading, you will have a second peak. Following that, one more high reading and then lows for the rest of your cycle.

The monitor will warn you of the end of your cycle as it flashes “m” when you check it in the morning. This is helpful for women who aren’t tracking their cycle every day. When/If your cycle starts, you simply reset it to cycle day (cd) 1 and start the process all over again.

While the monitor makes the official fertility reading, it is possible to see changes with the naked eye. With the wick end to your left, the first line is the LH reading and the second line is the estrogen reading. As your LH increases, the first line will get darker. As your estrogen increases, the second line will actually get lighter. It is important to let the monitor make the official reading, but this information is more for the curiosity of my readers.

You can purchase the monitor and the refill sticks online and in some retail stores.

Pros:

• Potentially saving you $$ from wasted OPKs as the monitor learns your specific cycle
• You don’t have to decide if you are fertile or not, the monitor makes that decision for you.
• Identifies the days leading up to ovulation to allow you to take advantage of the fertile time.
• Pretty easy to use

Cons:

• Price. The initial cost for the monitor and the refill sticks can get to be pretty expensive.

Ovwatch: Admittedly, this is the one fertility monitoring method that I know the least about.  However, I do know the basics of how it works.  The watch is worn at night by the woman (from the start of her cycle through ovulation) and detects the changes in the various hormones/minerals excreted through the skin.  No temping, no charting, no peeing in or on anything.  It gives you four fertile days prior to ovulation allowing you to take advantage of the fertile periods leading to ovulation.

I have never seen or heard of this product being available in a retail store and believe it’s only available online.  However, I could be wrong.

Pros:

• Gives you advanced warning of ovulation and fertile periods
• One of the least messy/invasive of all of the other methods available
• You can share it with friends/sisters (unlike most other methods)
• You only have to buy refills on the sensors.

Cons:

• Price

Well there you go friends, some of the more specifics of the different methods.  I hope you enjoy the proverbial  trip through the aisles of fertility monitoring products.  If you have any other pros or cons you’d like to add to my lists, please feel free to post a comment or two!

Stay Safe!

http://babymaker.wordpress.com ]]> http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/blog/2009/03/part-two-monitoring-your-fertility/feed/ 1 http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/blog/2009/02/the-joys-and-frustrations-of-monitoring-your-fertility-part-one/ http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/blog/2009/02/the-joys-and-frustrations-of-monitoring-your-fertility-part-one/#comments Thu, 19 Feb 2009 19:57:49 +0000 JustCallMeTeach http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/blog2/?p=124

I think it’s probably assumed, but since I haven’t actually stated it, I am not a doctor. Your fertility journey is best directed by your doctor/midwife/ob-gyn and your unique personal conditions. Any posts I make regarding possible aids/tests/supplements are to be taken as a point in which to start your own research and to spark the conversation with your medical specialist….

Part One:

Monitoring your fertility….depending on the person, the budget, the condition it can be anywhere from free and easy to expensive and complicated.

Let’s look take a look at some of your standard options.

• Going by the calendar
• Basal Body Temperature (BBT) (also known as “charting”)
• Checking physical fertility signs
• Ovulation Predictor Kits (OPKs)
• Ferning Microscope
• Clearblue Easy Fertility Monitor (CBEFM)
• Ovuwatch

Calendar: Determining how long it is from the first day of your period to the first day of your next period, subtracting 14 days and assuming you are fertile for the two days prior to that date – two days after that date. For example, 30 day cycle – 14 days would put the fertile period (and intercourse timing) from day 14-18.

Pros:

• Cost: Free
• Ease: Pretty Simple
• Materials needed: Calendar

Cons:

• Stress, sleep, exercise, illness and more can all delay ovulation (sometimes to the point of completely missing your presumed fertile window). This leads to stress about possible pregnancy when your period doesn’t show up “when it should”. As a result, you can waste months trying at the wrong point and money on pregnancy tests.

Basal Body Temperatures: Using a specialized thermometer (average $10 available at most retail stores) you record your waking temperature (either orally or vaginally) at the same time every morning, recording them on a chart and watching the patterns to determine potential fertile periods.

Pros:

• Relatively cheap (one time purchase for the thermometer, optional repeated purchase of tracking software such as Fertilityfriend.com, or Ovusoft Software)
• Reusable
• More accurate at pinpointing ovulation (and therefore knowing when you should expect your period)
• Prospect of “predicting” a positive pregnancy test (through a sustained/increasing waking temperature)

Cons:

• Can be influenced through illness (fevers/congestion/etc), lack of sleep, alcohol, room temperature (drastic changes) and make it difficult to determine ovulation (if it occurs around ovulation time).
• You have to have at minimum of 3 hours of sleep and have a standard waking time (if the earliest you wake up is 5:30 for work, you have to temp at 5:30 on your days off too).
• Repeated purchases of monitoring software can become expensive
• BBT will show you when ovulation has occurred, possibly too late for successful timing (when charting is your only method)

Charting the physical signs: Monitoring the physical signs of fertility: Cervical Position (CP), Cervical firmness/opening (CF) and/or Cervical Mucus (CM).  Cervical position will move from low and firm (infertile) to high and soft (fertile).  Cervical Mucus will move from sticky or tacky (infertile) through Watery or Eggwhite (fertile).  While CM can be checked externally (from the opening of the vagina) CP and CF can only be checked internally (placing one or two clean fingers into the vagina and feeling for the changes with the cervix.

Pros:

• Free
• Can signal approaching fertility, allowing you to take maximum advantage of the days leading up to ovulation
• Can also be used in avoiding pregnancy

Cons:

• Some women are “grossed out” by checking internally for these signs.
• Some women have problems identifying what they are looking for.  (Unable to distinguish the location of the cervix, firmness, opening)
• Some are confused by the differences between the consistencies of the CM.  Additionally, some are confused between seminal leftovers and cervical mucus.

Stay tuned for part two!

http://babymaker.wordpress.com ]]> http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/blog/2009/02/the-joys-and-frustrations-of-monitoring-your-fertility-part-one/feed/ 0 http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/blog/2009/02/greetings-fellow-ttc-ers/ http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/blog/2009/02/greetings-fellow-ttc-ers/#comments Thu, 05 Feb 2009 19:25:30 +0000 JustCallMeTeach http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/blog2/?p=121

This is my first post on the CTP blog so I figure I owe you the honor of introducing myself. After all, as our relationship progresses, you’ll end up knowing more about the inner workings of the more private aspects of my life.

So, me. I’m a married, 25 year old woman from the midwest. I spend my days teaching three and four year olds the basics of life. I love my job…well, at least, most of the time. I enjoy photography, camping, movies and peeing on sticks. (Too much info too soon?) My husband and I were married in October of 2006 and I went off my birth control shortly there after. We had the philosophy that we weren’t getting any younger and if we got pregnant right away, it’d be ok.

But that didn’t happen.

A couple of months went by and I didn’t worry too much. Then came another Christmas with no baby. I started worrying a little more, but we still were just letting things happen. Spring and Summer, going into fall…nothing. Then, the day before Halloween, I found out I was pregnant. I ended up having a blighted ovum (more about what those are later) and miscarried naturally right before Thanksgiving. (As if the holidays aren’t hard enough!).

So here I am, a day-time mom to 20 preschoolers, without any of my own. We’ve hit the two year mark and have admitted to defeat (in some sense of the word). Come this May, if I haven’t gotten pregnant again, I’m going to go in and we’re going to start the barrage of testing.

After 2 years, I consider myself a quasi-expert on all things ttc. I’ve either read it, had a friend go through it or done it. Charting, OPK’s, Monitoring, Ferning Method, Vitamins, Herbs—just about everything you can think of. At this point, I’ve also developed quite a sense of humor and a pretty straight-forward perspective on this whole business.

Hopefully our relationship will be a fantastic one. I hope my journey provides you some entertainment, some education or even just some encouragement, knowing you aren’t alone out there.

Stay Safe and Happy Breeding!

http://babymaker.wordpress.com ]]> http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/blog/2009/02/greetings-fellow-ttc-ers/feed/ 0